Questions and Answers
by AquilaTempestas
Summary: Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives. Taking questions!
1. The Rules

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Note**

I was inspired to write this after reading, dorabeadarling's 'Galactic Interviews'.

.

**Chapter One: The Rules**

The Team Galactic members were currently sitting in Cynthia's throne room, looking extremely worried. Charon was sweating. Saturn was playing with his thumbs. Jupiter was silently praying for mercy and Mars was giving the boss a shoulder massage because it made her feel better. As for Cyrus? He was torn between pushing Mars away or just letting her continue doing her job.

"Now, you're probably wondering why you have been brought here," Cynthia started, pacing back and forth, her long golden locks trailing down her back. "I have brought you here to repent for your sins by answering embarrassing questions from the citizens around Sinnoh. If you do not answer the questions, we will send you to N's Land in Unova and you'll have to play with him."

The Galactic commanders were terrified; being stuck at N's Land was the ultimate torture, not even sharing a bunk bed with a grunt came close. Saturn raised his hand. "Um, miss? What sort of questions?"

Cynthia smirked. "Personal questions mostly. We have decided the best way to punish criminals is to make them answer questions until they beg for mercy. Once you've answered a certain number of questions, we will release you. If we discover that you are lying, we will bring in our torturer, Elite Four member Flint, to tickle you until you tell the honest truth."

Saturn turned pale. This sounded scary.

"This is ridiculous…" Cyrus muttered.

"I look forward to hearing what _you _have to say especially," Cynthia said. "Now, you'll each take turns to sit in the question chair. It will shock you if it senses you are lying. There's a chair for the guys and a chair for the girls they are specifically designed to shock certain areas of the body. It was Volkner's idea."

Charon looked at the two chairs. They looked like the average typical wooden chair without armrests, but they probably transformed into something once the person was seated. He took in a mouthful of air and swallowed nervously. "How are the questions asked?"

"The person will enter through the door and they will sit on the iron throne and ask their questions. They may ask up to three questions at a time."

"And they can ask anything?" Mars squeaked.

Cynthia nodded. "Yes. _Anything. _The more R rated the question is, the more laughs for us all."

Cyrus glared. He never realized that Cynthia was so evil. "Who will go first?"

She pointed at Saturn. "You. On the chair."

Saturn gulped and walked over to the chair Cynthia was pointing at. It read the Male Chair. He sat down and immediately the chair sprung to life. Two robotic arms appeared from the head of the chair. The two hands moved to the space between Saturn's legs. Saturn froze his eyes wide with terror. What the heck? Cynthia surely wasn't joking. "Eep," he squeaked. Fortunately, the robotic hands didn't try to castrate him just yet.

"May the first person enter the room with your questions for Saturn!"

Saturn could only hope they'd treat him nicely since he was the cute one… or at least, that's what he liked to think.

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These chapters probably won't be that long – it really depends on the questions you guys want aske otherwise I'm going to have to make up a bunch of generic questions. It's more fun if you guys involved. There are no limitations at all – you can ask _anything. _Ask your questions either by review or by PM. I'll update as soon as I have a couple of questions. As always, reviews are much appreciated


	2. Saturn, Round One

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

No one reviewed nor submitted questions sadly. Although, I must thank my three followers for adding this story to their list

.

**Chapter Two: Saturn, Round One**

The person who walked into the room was none other than Lucas. Saturn knew the name because he was smart and looked it up on PokePedia. Lucas was the assistant of Professor Rowan's and known to be a rather smart. Or at least, that's what the profile said. Saturn straightened in his chair and waited for the first set of questions.

"What's up with hair style?" Lucas said.

Why did people always have to target the hair first? They were jealous because his hair was so cool and styled to look a bit like the Devil's horns… or cat ears, as some Galactic grunts called them. He hated being called Kitty-Kat. "You're just jealous because my hair is actually cool, unlike yours. I mean, you wear a cap over your head," Saturn pointed out. "Galactic people are stylish, so we need cool hairstyles to match our stunning outfits."

Lucas, Cynthia and Charon snickered. Saturn frowned. Okay, so Galactic weren't exactly rated highly in the 'sexiest clothing designs' poll, but at least his uniform made his butt look less big. The tight-clothing also brought out the best features in his female companions. Lucas actually looked like he wanted to puke. "Um, ok. Er, have you ever had the opportunity to bed one of your fellow commanders?"

Saturn shook his head. "Sadly, no. Cyrus has a policy against love-making unless it specifically involves him. It's why we can't share beds with someone else. However, that policy doesn't mean we can't love ourselves when we get lonely." He smiled, as memories of his self-loving session came to his mind.

The girls in the room all gagged, while Charon just laughed again. Cyrus remained silent, most likely disgusted at this revelation. Saturn didn't care though. Self-loving never hurt anyone else so what was the harm in it? "My final question is this, why do you have as Toxicroak as your main and not a cat to match your hair?"

Saturn glared. One more joke about his hair and he would… oh wait, no, he wouldn't do that otherwise he'd be castrated by the Male Chair. I'll get you back later, he thought. "Toxicroak was the more masculine option," he replied honestly. Jupiter's Skuntank had a furry tail and Mars had a cat. A toad was the better option.

"That's all my questions," Lucas said, exiting the room.

Saturn sighed. Well, that didn't turn out too badly. Cynthia looked at him, a little disappointedly. "Aw darn, I was hoping we could test the chair out on you… oh well, maybe next time!" she sighed, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. "Mars come to the Female Chair. It's your turn for round one of questions."

**.**

Since there were no submissions for questions, I came up with some of my own instead. These are short just because I need submissions to make things interesting. I will accept anything, so please submit your questions : )


	3. Mars, Round One

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Pokmaster Ace for leaving questions! Thank you so much! Also, thanks to DGMSilverAirHead03 for reviewing the first chapter.

.

**Chapter Three: Mars, Round One**

Mars sat down in the Woman's Chair, torn between joy and fear. Saturn seemed to have coped quite well with his set of three questions, but she was worried. What would they ask her? How personal would they become? Her fingers grasped the armrests as she waited in anticipation for the next trainer to enter.

"Enter, Pokmaster Ace!" Cynthia chirped.

The door opened revealing someone wearing a black robe, their features hidden by a hood. She couldn't tell if the person was a male or a female. She took in a nervous breath and waited for the first question.

"How would you react if Saturn was naked and tied to your bed?" the robed figure said.

Well now, that would be an interesting situation to be in, Mars thought. "Well, I'm not sexually attracted to Saturn so I'd probably just take photos of him and laugh about it. I could sell them for a good price! Would you be willing to buy them?"

In the background, they heard sounds of someone sobbing.

"What would you do if your Purugly was trying to kill Saturn?"

Mars stroked her chin, glancing over her shoulder to look at Saturn. "Hm… well, I like Saturn like a sister likes her brother so I'd do my best to stop Purugly from trying to kill him. All I'd really have to do it throw my Purugly some of her favourite poffins and Purugly would stop trying to commit murder." She flashed Saturn a smile. "We need Saturn on the team. He attracts the female grunts to join."

Saturn stopped sobbing. "I feel so loved."

"Last question!" Cynthia said.

"How would you react if planet Mars blew up and a Blastoise threw you in its place?"

Mars thought hard, stroking her chin thoughtfully. "I'd cry if the planet named after me blew up because I'm awesome!" Her fellow commanders laughed (except for Saturn). Even Cyrus failed to stifle a snicker. "I wouldn't be too thrilled if a Blastoise threw me in its place because I quite enjoy living here in Sinnoh. The people are so nice, the weather is great…" She trailed on and on until the chair gave her a shock on her upper lady parts. She yelped.

"Thanks for your questions, Pokmaster Ace!" Cynthia said, waving the trainer out the door. Mars was released from the chair and returned to her seat. "Next to face questioning is… Cyrus!" Everyone cheered. It was about time their boss suffered and they hoped he suffered badly because he was a jerk.

He stood up and wandered over to the Male Chair and sat himself down looking dead as usual.

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I've decided to up the question limit. You can ask up to four a chapter. Please do! Share the crackiness! Reviews are much appreciated, as always!


	4. Cyrus, Round One

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Pokmaster Ace, Sailor Taichichi Vegeta and ExodiusLK for leaving questions!

.

**Chapter Four: Cyrus, Round One**

There were many things Cyrus would rather be doing right now than be forced to sit in a stupid chair answering questions from random people. For example, he could be watching an episode of _Game of Thrones _on his computer rather than be here. Unfortunately, he didn't have much of a choice though.

Cynthia grinned. "We have three people coming in to ask your questions, Cyrus."

"What? That's not fair! Everyone knows I'm the coolest one in the group," Saturn whined.

Someone hit him.

"Pokmaster Ace is back to ask some questions for you, Cyrus."

Great, thought Cyrus. "Send the person in so this ordeal can be over with."

Pokmaster Ace returned. "My first question for you is this. If you had to get with any commander, who would it be?"

Cyrus glared. Of course the first question to be answered had something to do with romance. "If I had to get with any commander, it would be specifically for biological purposes." He thought that was a good enough answer when the chair shocked him in the neck. He jumped, taken by surprise and shot Cynthia a glare.

"You didn't answer the question. Fail to answer correctly again and you'll receive a shock somewhere unpleasant," she threatened.

He growled. "Fine. I would not get with Charon nor Saturn because I am not gay. Besides, males can't fall pregnant so I would have no other reason for keeping them around. And even if they could somehow fall pregnant and I wouldn't want them reproducing anyway because of their imperfect genes." Charon and Saturn both shouted, 'Hey!' at the same time, but were ignored. Cyrus continued. "So that leaves me with Jupiter and Mars. Jupiter is loud-mouthed, immature and obnoxious. She has also been used several times by some of the grunts. She is impure."

Mars was the only one who laughed since the other commanders were fuming with anger at being insulted by their boss. "Yeah, you are totally right, boss!"

"That leaves me with Mars." He paused, choosing his words carefully. "Mars is… loyal, obedient and rather…" he stopped suddenly, realizing he was sharing more information than asked of him. "I would choose Mars without a second thought."

"Thanks, boss! I'd choose you too!" she chirped.

He grimaced.

"My next question is this: How would you react if Mars tried to seduce you?"

Cyrus lifted his eyebrows. That was getting rather… personal for his liking. Surely, he didn't have to answer something like that? He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "She wouldn't try to seduce me." All she had to do was ask and he'd do her on his desk just the way she liked it.

All eyes in the room turned to face Mars who blushed. "It's true. I don't need to seduce him. I just ask."

"You weren't meant to tell them, Mars," Cyrus said. Great, now his commanders would be jealous because he was spending more intimate time with Mars and the league Champion could blackmail him with this knowledge. "Next question."

"Are you Saturn's father?"

Saturn screamed. "I hope not!"

Cyrus was offended. Why would it be such a bad thing to be related to someone as genetically perfect as he was? "No, I am not Saturn's father. He's a couple of years younger than me so it wouldn't make any sense."

"My last question is how would you react if Cynthia seduced you?"

Cynthia stuck a finger down her throat and made gagging noise. She actually looked physically sick. "Seduce _him?" _she shrieked. "You'd have to drug me first."

"I would be quite concerned," Cyrus answered. "I would immediately know there was something wrong with her and would take her to the Pokemon Centre to be healed. There is no fun in fighting someone who is unwell because there is no challenge. Besides, if word got out the Champion was trying to sleep with the enemy she would be forever shamed."

"Don't worry Cyrus I have no intentions of ever touching _any _part of you!" Cynthia scolded, a hand resting on her stomach, as if he were preparing to hurl into a bucket or something. "Thank you for your questions, Pokemaster Ace. I hope to see you again in the near future." Pokmaster Ace bowed and exited the room.

The next trainer entered. The person was also wearing a black hooded robe. "I'm Sailor Taichichi Vegeta and I have two questions for you. Cyrus… how in the Sam Hill did you get a Crobat and how'd you escape being mauled by Giratina in the Distortion World?"

Cyrus relaxed. At least this trainer wasn't trying to pry into his sexual life for a change. "I would sneak my Golbat into Amity Square at night and let him fool around with the Soothe Bell for an hour or so. I did this activity every night until he evolved. It took some time but it was worth it in the end."

"Aw, that's so sweet, boss!" Jupiter said. "You do care!"

"To answer your second question, I ordered Crobat to confuse Giratina. It gets a little boring being chased up and down waterfalls after awhile as you can imagine. The confused Giratina let me escape and well, here I am."

"The Distortion World sounds like a crazy place," Saturn said.

"It is a place to complex for your puny brain to understand, Saturn," Cyrus retorted.

Cynthia looked frustrated. She probably wanted to see him fail at something just so she could watch him suffer. "Thank you Sailor Taichichi Vegeta for your questions. I hope you will join us in the future." The hooded trainer exited the building. Only one person to go and this session would be over. "May the final trainer please enter the room!"

This trainer also had a black hood. "I'm ExodiusLk and my question is…" the trainer seemed a little hesitant to say their question out aloud. Either that or he was mistaking hesitance for suppressing laughter again. "How long is your dong?" The trainer started laughing. Cynthia joined in shortly. His commanders (namely Charon, Saturn and Jupiter) looked interested while Mars just smiled.

Cyrus however, was quite confused. "I do not understand the question. What does the sound a large bell make have to do with me?" His confusion only caused Cynthia to chuckle even louder. Jupiter fell on the floor laughing so hard tears were rolling down her cheeks. Saturn just glanced at the boss and shook his head.

"Yes, do tell us!" Cynthia said.

"Maybe his tough-guy act is just him trying to compensate for his lack of size?" Jupiter said.

He was still confused. It didn't help that pretty much everyone around him was giggling hysterically. "I am confused. Please clarify the question."

"Dong is a vulgar slang term for penis, boss," Saturn said, trying hard to restrain his laughter. "The trainer wants to know what the length of your package." He broke down into uncontrollable giggles again.

_Oh, _so that's what dong meant. What a strange term. "I do not see why I should answer this question." Letting the world know about his relationship with Mars was enough, but now he was expected to inform the world about his size down there? That was not going to happen. No way. It wasn't that he had anything to be ashamed since he knew he was well-hung, but he didn't want to make the rest of the male population jealous.

Cynthia had now recovered from her laughing fit. She narrowed her eyes and glared daggers at him. "You will answer the question or I shall have the chair strip you bare!" Cynthia threatened.

"Oo, please do!" Jupiter said.

"Dear Arceus, no!" Saturn wailed.

"You are just jealous Saturn because yours is so small!" Mars teased. "That's why you wear skin-tight pants!"

"Skin-tight pants are cool!" Saturn complained. "They're comfortable and highlight my sexy physique!"

Someone barfed.

"Answer the question, Cyrus!"

"I do not sleep with a ruler besides my bed to check my length in the morning therefore I can't answer your question." There were a few disappointed 'aww man' and one 'thank Arceus!' comments from the party present. "Is that a sufficient answer, Champion?" he said smugly.

Cynthia looked to be having some sort of an internal debate, but she pushed a button freeing Cyrus from the Male Chair. He stood up, flexed his arms for no real reason and prepared to head back towards his commanders when the chair turned on. "This is for being a smart ass and for trying to destroy the universe," she said.

An extra leg appeared from underneath the chair. "What the…" The leg swung upwards striking him hard. He fell to the ground causing the other guys in the room to wince. The girls (excluding Mars), just laughed.

Cynthia rubbed her hands together gleefully. "Charon, you are next!"

.

Questions for Charon next! Keep them coming!


	5. Charon, Round One

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Sailor Taichichi Vegeta, Pokmaster Ace, Jackpot 2 and Skarrow for your questions! Apologies for the delay, but I got caught up with other stuff and didn't have much time to update. I will try and be faster next time. Thanks again!

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**Chapter Five: Charon, Round One**

Charon walked over to sit down on the chair, kicking Cyrus on the way over. The boss was currently incapable of doing anything right now in his position so Charon made sure to land a hit in while he had the chance. The stupid cocky bastard deserved it. He sat down, scratched his bottom and waited.

"Skarrow would like interview you first. Skarrow? Please enter!"

One of the floor tiles beneath the Male Chair suddenly opened. A dirty boy dressed in a brown sack crawled out of the ground, wearing sunglasses so big it took up half his face. The boy crawled across the floor then stood up, dusting himself off for no apparent reason. He stood up and grinned. "Please tell me about the first time you ever dated."

"Charon? On a date?" Mars started laughing.

Charon glared. "I have been on a date! I remember her so well… her name was Carolina… she was so pretty… We went and saw a movie together."

"Carolina?" Cynthia repeated, looking alarmed.

"Professor Carolina. She lives in Celestic Town."

Cynthia paled. "You dated my grandmother?"

Charon was equally shocked. "She's your grandmother?"

"Ew, someone actually dated Charon. He must've drugged her or something," Jupiter mocked.

Mars laughed again. "Please tell me you didn't sleep with her."

"Arceus, I hope not," Cynthia remarked.

Charon shook his head. "She didn't want to sleep with me. I did try, but for some reason the thought of sleeping with me repulsed her." He then frowned. Had he been a terrible date? It would explain why she had whacked him over the head and run away claiming that all 'men only cared about getting laid'.

"Aw, poor Charon. She didn't put out."

"Thank goodness for that! I don't want to be related to him," Cynthia said, sighing with relief.

Charon glanced over the chair. "We had a genuine thing going on Mars. We worked on our relationship unlike you and our boss. It took me a lot of courage to ask her out – did the boss even bother with that?" Mars didn't reply. Charon gave a smug smile. "I thought as much."

"All right, let's move this along. There are a few other trainers waiting to have questions answered," Cynthia said. "Ask your next question, Skarrow."

Skarrow nodded and stepped forward, readjusting his sunglasses. "Are you an S or M?"

An S or M? Charon wasn't sure what that meant but he assumed it wasn't a sexual thing. Did it have something to do with his clothing? "I am a medium."

"I think he's asking you if you are a sadist or a masochist, Charon," Mars pointed out. Of course she know that being the Queen of Pain. No wonder she convinced Cyrus to screw her into his desk – they had so much in common.

"Oh… I guess I would classify myself as a sadist. I prefer to watch others suffer than suffer pain myself."

"Sissy," said Mars.

"All right, my third question is this. Would you rather put the tissue box on the left side of the bed, or the right side?"

Once again, Charon was confused. Did tissue box mean something else or did this Skarrow actually mean a tissue box? He thought hard trying to recall the last time he had a cold. "The tissue box goes on the right because my bed is up against the left wall," Charon said, hoping that he had answered the question correctly.

Cynthia didn't press the zap button so he assumed he had answered it right… either that, or she was confused as well. "Ask your last question, Skarrow."

"How did you end up joining Team Galactic?"

His mind went back a year, recalling the events that led up to his recruitment. He had been fired from Silph Co. after he had created a virus which caused random porno ads to appear on everyone's screens. It had been hilarious at the time but he regretted it now. At least the people at Silph Co. paid him better. "I was fired and in desperate need of a job. Cyrus found me moping at the gambling area. He knew that I once worked at Silph Co. and offered me a place at his company. I agreed."

Skarrow suddenly exploded into a few million pieces for no explainable reason. Even Charon's brains couldn't figure out how it could've happened. Blood, guts and various other bits and pieces flew in all random directions. One of the said pieces hit Charon in the face. He cringed. How gross. "Okay… that was weird…" Cynthia said.

The others nodded. The room was now a mess and it stunk. Jupiter summoned her Skuntank and ordered it to spray its gases to clear the air. Surprisingly, it worked and the room smelt reasonably good again, although it was still a bloody mess. "I look forward to the next set of questions," Charon said. The questions weren't that bad at least.

The next trainer entered the room. This person wore a hood which covered their face. "My name is Jackpot 2. If you had to pick between Cyrus and Saturn, which one would you go out with?"

Charon groaned. He had spoken to soon. "Cyrus or Saturn…" He'd rather get gassed in the face by Jupiter's Skuntank than go out with one of those freaks, but he knew the rules. He had to answer the question or receive an injury. He cleared his throat. "Saturn is too much of a girly-man. He wears skinny pants and sways his hips when he walks."

"I take offense to that!" Saturn wailed.

Charon rolled his eyes. "Cyrus on the other hand is the opposite of that, but he's mean. I think I'd go with Saturn, at least he's nice to me."

"Thanks Charon, but I'd never go out with you, not even if you paid me."

"Which team do you think is cooler? Team Galactic or Team Plasma?"

"Team Galactic obviously. Our outfits are superior." Which was really saying something since their outfits were rather ridiculous too. "And even though Cyrus is a jerk, he's quite normal in comparison to Ghetsis."

Mars nodded. "I agree with Charon for once. Their outfits are so much worse than ours. I wonder what their head pieces weigh?"

"My final question… What does the fox say?!"

Charon knew the answer to this question. He remembered coming across it one day while he was surfing the net searching for pornos to watch (since the internet was for porn). "Wa-wa-way-do wub-wid-bid-dum-way-do wa-wa-way-do," Charon answered smugly while the others just looked at him as if he had just made out with an inflatable alien doll.

"What the heck…" said Saturn. "What language is that?"

The other commanders were speechless.

"Thanks for the questions, Jackpot 2. We hope to see you again in the future." Cynthia gave the trainer a smile and the trainer walked out. "Please enter the room, Pokmaster Ace!"

That was a name Charon had become familiar with. The trainer had shown up before. What questions did the trainer have this time? He hoped they weren't too difficult to answer. Pokmaster Ace entered the room, this time with a red jacket on. Charon had come to the conclusion Pokmaster Ace was in fact a male.

Pokmaster Ace faced Charon. "Out of our commanders who would you get with?"

"Not Saturn that's for sure."

"Thank goodness for that."

"That leaves me with Jupiter or Mars… both ladies are quite attractive and intelligent and they would both make suitable love-… er, wives." He turned a deep shade of red and cleared his throat. "But Mars is a sadist. I don't think my body could handle the things she'd do to me so I would choose Jupiter. Besides, Jupiter has a bigger bust."

Jupiter smiled. "Thanks, Charon. I-hey, wait a minute. You've been looking at my chest?" She growled, and made a gagging noise. "Cynthia, please zap him!" Cynthia hit the zap button. Charon jumped in his chair and rubbed the back of his neck. Stupid chair.

"Jupiter's breasts are fake!" Mars exclaimed.

"You're just jealous, Mars."

Mars stuck out her tongue. "No!"

"Yes!"

"I refuse to continue this argument further."

Charon just sighed. Women.

"Are you an old pervy idiot like Professor Oak?"

Professor Oak was a perve? That was news to Charon but he didn't find that surprising at all. The man was related to Blue Oak, the most perverted Champion in the history of perverted Champions. The guy was such a man whore. "I am old but I am not an perverted idiot," Charon said, rubbing his chin. "I simply admire the female figure, that's all."

"Pervert," muttered Jupiter.

"That brings me to my third question. Are you attracted to our epic host?"

Charon looked at Cynthia. She looked disgusted. "Cynthia is an attractive lady. She reminds me greatly of Carolina's appearance when she was younger."

"You disgust me!" Cynthia said. She hit the zap button again. Charon felt a tingle race down his legs. Jupiter and Mars chuckled. Even Saturn laughed. "You are a fat sleazy fool. I can understand why my grandmother refused to sleep with you."

Charon sniffed. Cynthia was so mean.

"Finally, are you emo?"

"I am not emo." He was just a pervy old man who loved science.

"Well, that's it from me," said Pokmaster Ace. He left the room.

Cynthia glanced down at her list. "And the last trainer is… Sailor Taichichi Vegeta!" Another name Charon recognized. The trainer skipped into the room.

"How do you get along with the scientists from other evil teams?"

Hmm, good question, thought Charon. "We occasionally meet up to talk about our stupid leaders over some tea and biscuits. Colress is the funniest of the bunch. The others are pretty good too, but I think I'm smarter than them all."

"Do you think you're paid well enough? What benefits do you get?"

Charon glanced down at Cyrus and glared. "I am underpaid. The other scientists get paid more than I do and they do less work. Cyrus keeps deducting my pay and giving my share to Mars." He paused briefly then continued speaking. "But I suppose my benefits are reasonably good. I do get my own room and my own bathroom. I also have my own computer and I'm allowed to rent porn."

"Where do you get your tapes from?" Saturn said.

"I import them from Kalos."

"Cool!"

"Ew," said Mars and Jupiter.

"Are you going to catch Rotom soon and keep it in a Pokeball with you?"

A tender expression took hold of Charon's face. "I wish I could catch a Rotom, but unfortunately I have yet to find one. If I did cross paths with one, I would never keep it inside its ball. Together, we would play pranks on my fellow commanders and the boss. We would…"

"Oh, shut up, Charon. Your obsession with Rotom is creepy," Jupiter commented.

"He did write the love poem,_ Ode to a Rotom," _commented Saturn.

Charon grinned at the mention. It had taken him many weeks to come up with the words. "Ah yes, that was a brilliant poem." He was zapped again. He frowned. "What?"

"You are disgusting," Cynthia stated. "Get out of the Male Chair!" Charon obliged. He stood up and escaped before the chair could do anything to him. Cynthia turned to Jupiter. "Now it's your turn." She grinned.

Jupiter gulped.

.

Next up is Jupiter! See you all soon! Reviews are much appreciated, as always!

To Pokmaster Ace – I've asked about the reasons for removing the story, but have yet to receive a reply. I'll let you know what happens as soon as I get a reply. If you want a special entrance or whatnot, let me know!


	6. Jupiter, Round One

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Pokmaster Ace, ExtremelyCreativeUsername, ShinyPoochyena45 and In The Forest for taking time to leave questions! I appreciate it : D

.

**Chapter Six: Jupiter, Round One**

Jupiter sat down in the Female Chair. "Bring it on," she said. Based on all the questions so far, she didn't have much to be afraid of. What was the worst that could happen anyway? Besides, this was her first time being interviewed so it gave a boost to her self-confidence because no one ever asked her anything.

"All right, you may enter trainer!"

The door popped open and a trainer wearing a dark black hooded cloak entered the room. The trainer faced Jupiter and asked the first question. "I'm In The Forest. My first question is, are your breasts fake?"

That question caused the other Galactic members to burst into hysterical laughter (except for Cyrus who snorted). Even Cynthia spared a few giggles. If Jupiter could cross her arms she would but the chair didn't allow that so she just glared. "Okay, so I _might have _spent a few dollars on enlargement surgery."

"I think they're great, Jupiter," Charon said.

Jupiter wished she could hit him right now. "Shut up, Charon."

"Why did you want bigger breasts anyway?" Cynthia said.

"She wanted male attention – all the males were looking at me and she was jealous," Mars said. "She can't stand being second-best to me."

Jupiter growled. "Next question!"

Mars chuckled.

"How did you feel beating Barry only to be beaten later on?" In The Forest said.

Jupiter's fingers tightened on the arms of the Female Chair. Barry… he was that annoying uppity brat with the bushel of blond hair that never shut up. "I felt cheated. He only managed to beat me because he paired up with that little witch Dawn."

"But didn't you pair up with Mars?" Charon pointed out.

"She lost the battle for us. I would've done better on my own." Mars was the youngest of the group and the weakest. The only thing she was good for was attracting men and sleeping with them while Jupiter had to clean up her mess.

"And my final question. How did your Skuntank evolve early? First battle it was twenty-three, yet Stunky evolves at thirty-four? I call illegal for that."

"I'm a Galactic member. You think we fight fairly?" Jupiter replied. "Besides, a lot of people are doing it. I hear Lance has three illegal Dragonites." She took in a deep breath and sighed. "Charon came across some Slowpoke Tail juice which forces Pokemon to evolve early. I didn't think it would actually work."

"I thought Slowpoke Tail juice was an aphrodisiac?" Saturn said.

"Only if a human takes some," Charon replied. Everyone (except for Jupiter since she couldn't), looked at Charon. "What? Sometimes I need a little bit of help getting it up."

Cynthia gagged. "Way too much information."

"Agreed."

"Thanks for your questions, In The Forest. We hope to see you in the future!" Cynthia smiled. In The Forest bowed and exited the room. "May the next trainer please enter!"

The next trainer entered the room wearing a black cloak without a hood. The trainer was female and wore the 'Magma' symbol on her cloak. She approached Jupiter. "I'm ShinyPoochyena45 and one of the new commanders for Magma. I've got a few questions for you. Why is your hair a Medicham and your main Pokemon that vulgar Skuntank?"

"Jupiter has a weird taste in perfume," Saturn pointed out.

Jupiter grimaced. "I like standing out in the crowd hence my hairstyle. As for the second half of your question, Skuntank is _not_ vulgar – you're just not used to the beautiful aroma she emits. Skuntank is amazing and I'm glad the boss let me keep her when she arrived on our doorstep."

"I regret it now," Cyrus said.

"We now have a limitless supply of tomatoes in the warehouse just in case one of us gets sprayed," Saturn added. Jupiter sniffed. Why did everyone have to tease her?

"Second question. Who is cooler? Magma or Aqua?" ShinyPoocheyna45 said.

"Magma's colour is red and red reminds me of Mars and Mars is a whore," Jupiter replied, shaking her head, ignoring Mars' cry of 'HEY'. "Therefore, I must say Aqua is cooler."

ShinyPoochyena sighed. "What would you do if Saturn was naked on your bed?"

"It's funny that you mention that because he has been naked on my bed several times actually," Jupiter replied. "We were trying to raise some extra cash because the boss docked our pay so he could buy some more tomatoes. Saturn had this idea about making a nude male calendar. We were desperate."

"Did it sell well?" Cynthia said.

"All the female grunts in the building bought one then Cyrus found out and had them all burnt," Jupiter replied.

"The images were distracting the female staff members," Cyrus answered.

"Anyway, to answer your question, I'd probably screw him. He's adorable."

Saturn put on a fake smile. Clearly, he was uncomfortable. "I guess I should be flattered.

"Last, but not least. If Maxie, leader of Team Magma asked you out, what would you do?"

Jupiter shuddered. "Scream. He's probably related to Mars in some way – they both have red hair."

"I swear, I'm not related to that guy," Mars pointed out.

Jupiter ignored her. She wasn't going to believe it until Mars had a DNA test to prove she wasn't related to Maxie. Cynthia thanked ShinyPoochyena for her questions and the trainer walked out. Another trainer entered immediately, a wide grin on her face. She ran up to Jupiter and gave the surprised Galactic member a hug then pulled away.

"I'm ExtremelyCreativeUsername! Jupi, you're my favourite!"

"Alert the media, Jupiter has fans!" Mars teased.

"Yeah, one," smirked Cyrus.

Those bastards, Jupiter thought. She was going to find a way to make them both suffer… She pushed thoughts of revenge out of her mind and smiled at her fan. It was nice to know someone appreciated her. She didn't even mind being called Jupi. "Thank you."

"So, Jupi, what are your thoughts on Detective Looker?"

"He's not a bad looking guy, but he's a little messed up in the head," Jupiter said. She remembered seeing that guy on television once on some cop show. He had the strangest way of speaking sometimes it was hard to follow what he was prattling on about.

"Which member of Team Galactic would you be most likely to date?"

Of course, someone was going to ask her the dating question. "Well, I'd probably choose Saturn. Out of the guys, he's the one I spend the most time with. I mean, he's comfortable being around me in his birthday suit. He's cute, kind and quite gentle. So yeah, Saturn would be the one I'd date if I had to choose." But she wouldn't go out on a date with him – she saw him like her younger brother now. Dating him would just feel totally wrong.

The trainer gave Jupiter another hug then exited the room. "Why does no one ever want to date me?" Charon whined. He was ignored as usual.

Cynthia glanced down at the card and read the next name on list. "Pokmaster Ace! Please step inside!" Unlike last time, Pokmaster Ace did not enter through the doorway. Showerheads appeared from the ceiling and released a black and blood red which filled the room within seconds. Fortunately, no one was harmed. The smoke cleared several moments later but Pokmaster Ace was nowhere to be seen.

"Ooh, that's so cool!" Mars exclaimed.

"What's happening?" Jupiter said, looking from side to side, trying to catch a glimpse of the activity going on around her. She didn't see Pokmaster Ace, but she did see a bit of blood underneath her feet. She lifted her legs, not wanting to get her brand new shoes wet.

A few moments later, a hole opened up in the pool of blood. Pokmaster Ace pulled himself out and stood up off the ground, drenched in blood. It was quite a dramatic entrance. He stood in front of Jupiter and grinned, blood dripping down onto the floor. Jupiter found it hard not to be freaked out. "Did you make any sex tapes?"

Her eyes widened. "How did you know…"

"Everyone knows about your sex tapes, Jupiter," Charon said. "I filmed them, remember?"

Her face reddened. "Yes, I made a few sex tapes! I was desperate for some cash and I heard that sex sells! That's how Cyrus found me. In the porn studio." She had hoped that past was well behind her, but the past always came back to haunt it seemed.

"And Diantha tells me Team Flare were bad…" Cynthia murmured. "I need a couple of beers after this…"

"Are you attracted to anyone?"

"Sexually attracted? Yes. Saturn. Romantically though? Not at the moment," she said sadly.

"Are you bi?"

Jupiter shook her head. "I can find other women pretty, but I don't think that means I'm bisexual."

"And finally, are you emo?"

"Nope, not at all."

"Well, that's all from me."

Cynthia waved him goodbye and Pokmaster Ace left the room, leaving a trail of bloody footprints behind. Jupiter was released from the Female Chair and she returned to her original seat.

Cynthia stood in front of the Galactic members and cleared her throat. "We're heading into round two next and that means things are going to be a little bit more humiliating for each of you." Her smirk widened. "I'm not going to be present for round two since I've got a few things to do, but Flint and Volkner will be dropping by to supervise."

"What's happening in round two?" Charon said.

The Champion twirled a lock of blonde hair around a finger. "From now on, you'll be forced to lose a random piece of clothing per round. The chair will be removed so you'll be standing. This isn't meant to be a fun experience for you, remember." She turned to Saturn who paled. "Are you ready for round two, Saturn?"

.

Saturn is up for round two and to make things more embarrassing for them, they will be forced to… strip. Ask away! Reviews are much appreciated, as always!


	7. Saturn, Round Two

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to GamerGirl54321, Pokmaster Ace, CrackandDance, ExtremelyCreativeUsername and ShinyPoochyena45 for reviewing the previous chapter and leaving questions! I do enjoy doing what I can to answer your questions in a way I feel matches the characters (to a certain extent anyway).

.

**Chapter Seven: Saturn, Round Two**

Before returning to the room for round two, the Galactic members were forced to have biscuits and tea while they waited for the room to be cleaned up. Once the room was cleaned of the blood, they returned and found themselves in room with pink wallpaper. Charon and Saturn thought it looked pretty, but everyone else looked disgusted.

"Okay bitches, you have to sit down and listen to us!" Flint started. Jupiter and Mars sat down in their respective seats. The guys remained standing, confused expressions on their faces. "That includes you guys, as well. I call everyone a bitch," Flint added.

Volkner shrugged. "It's just a phase he's going through. Last month he was referring to everyone as his homies. Consider it a step-up." His eyes scanned the room. "Cynthia has told us what goes on in here. She also mentioned you have to lose an article of clothing each round… We've invited our dear old friend, Bertha, to do the honours."

Bertha was a member of the Elite Four like Flint. She was creepy in her own way – apparently, the woman kept a stash of male porn tapes under her bed. There was a rumour going around she had a fetish of dirty old men. The old lady entered the room and immediately wondered over to the three male members of Galactic.

She stood in front of Saturn first and looked him up and down. "…potential for a drag queen act…" she murmured then moved on to study Cyrus while Saturn frowned. "…I would like to dominate… but too young…" Cyrus sighed with relief as Bertha moved on to the final male. Her eyes widened. "Oh my!" She fanned herself. "You! You are… too sexy!"

Everyone in the room gagged, except for Charon of course. He just grinned. Finally, someone fancied him! Miracles did happen after all! "Too sexy for my shirt?" he teased.

"I think I'm going to be sick…" Jupiter murmured.

"I don't get paid enough for this shit…" Flint muttered.

Bertha grinned. "You and I are going to do the nasty later on!"

Again, everyone but Charon puked.

"Let's just get this nightmare over with…" Volkner started, pulling out a card. "Cynthia says it's time for Saturn to step up for round two. Saturn, please come forward."

Saturn did, paling at a dramatic rate. He was even more scared this time because of the scary Bertha. How in the name of Arceus could anyone find Charon sexy? A horrible image of Charon and Bertha square-dancing appeared randomly in his mind. Terrible stuff. He shuddered. "Here I am."

"Bertha, please stop staring at Charon's crotch," Flint said. He glanced down at his palm cards and read the text. "You'll have time to admire it later, but you have to flip the coin. If it lands on heads, Saturn loses his shirt. If it lands on tails, he loses his pants. Don't ask me why it's like that. For his sake, let's hope he didn't go commando."

Saturn reddened. Today he had decided to go commando. He could only hope and pray he didn't end up with tails otherwise he was going to be teased for the rest of his life. Bertha stood in front of him and flipped her silver coin up into the air. She quickly caught it and slammed it down on her hand then pulled it away to announce the result. "Tails!"

Of course. Of course it had to land on tails. He made a note never go commando again. Going commando ended up badly. He was well aware everyone was watching him. Here goes nothing, he thought, unzipping his pants to pull them down, revealing his family jewels to all those present. He was so embarrassed.

"Spin around!" Volkner ordered.

Saturn did as he was told. Someone laughed. Someone puked. Someone whistled. Someone clapped loudly. The others were torn between laughing and gagging. He stopped turning around and prayed this horrible session would be over so he could sit down again and cover himself in his embarrassment.

"It's quality that matters, Saturn. Don't feel bad," said Volkner, giving the commander an encouraging wink.

"Just get on with the questions."

Flint held up the card so he could read it properly. "GamerGirl54321! Would you please enter the room?"

A few seconds later, a girl skipped into the room. She was wearing the typical black-hooded cloak, but they knew she was a girl judging by her trainer ID name. She stood in front of Saturn and smiled. "First, are you a transgender?"

Saturn grumbled. "I am one hundred percent male!" Just because he had curvy hips that swayed from side to side as he walked, did not mean he was a female. Girls teased him because he was prettier than him and the guys mocked him because they were jealous they couldn't cross-dress easily. He pointed down to his crotch. "If I wasn't male, I wouldn't have one."

"He's got a point there…" he heard Flint mutter.

"Second, how would you feel if Cyrus and you did 'it' while you were drunk, but you both still remembered the experience?"

Sex with Cyrus? Like hell that would ever happened. Charon would've had to slip one of those Slowpoke Tail aphrodisiacs to make that become a reality. "Um… well, I'd feel disgusted, horrified and really sore and I would probably cry. He's bigger than me." Actually, if the deed somehow happened, he'd find himself in a grave once they had recovered from their hangover.

"You would never find me touching that thing," Cyrus pointed out. "Not even with a ten-foot pole."

"Likewise…" Saturn retorted. He tried to think of something smart to say, came up with a blank and decided to bring up something embarrassing instead to restore his dignity. "At least I never got my tool stuck in the zipper. Remember when Mars had to lend you a hand?" He snickered, feeling rather proud of himself for recalling that moment. That shut the boss up.

Flint shuddered. "I know how that feels… that's why we now have a no-zipper policy at the Sinnoh league." He recovered and looked at GamerGirl54321. "Thanks for the questions! We hope to see you again!"

Volkner winked. "See ya later!" The trainer left the room. "Okay, now we have Pokmaster Ace entering! Come in, man!"

Black and blood red smoke filled the room like it did last time Pokmaster Ace made his grand entrance. This time, blood rained down from the sky, melting the ground. Blood pools appeared and Pokmaster Ace rose from it, cackling like a possessed madmen. He gave Ghetsis a run for his money. "Nice, I should consider doing something like that the next time someone challenges me!" Flint declared.

Pokmaster looked at Saturn's face, blood dripping off his body. "Are you emo?"

Saturn shook his head. "No."

"Are you a neko?"

He sighed. "Just because my ears look like cat-ears, does not imply that I am part-feline."

"Aw, but you're so cute and cuddly!" Jupiter teased.

"Shut up, Jupiter."

"How would you react if the planet Mars blew up and a Blastoise threw Commander Mars in its place?"

Saturn stroked his chin. "I'd laugh probably. I'd be glad if Blastoise threw her away because she's so noisy."

"Jeez, thanks Saturn."

"Anytime, Mars."

"Last question. How would you react if someone stole your kidney and sold it on the black market?"

He cringed at the thought. He liked his kidneys. "I'd assume Team Rocket was behind it all because of the Slowpoke Tail thing. I wouldn't be too pleased though – how would you react if someone stole one of your kidneys for cash?" He noticed the insane trainer was holding a knife behind his back. He took a few steps back, suddenly afraid for his life. There were some crazy people in this world.

The trainer cackled again and sprinted out of the room, bathing himself in the blood raining down. As soon as he left though, it stopped raining. Saturn licked off some of the blood on his face. Strawberry flavoured. Nice. Not as good as peanut buttery and jelly sandwiches though, but close enough.

"This blood is some good stuff," Flint said, licking the crap off his face. "We're gonna have to clean up the room again though before it all dries up."

Volkner licked a finger. "I wonder what other flavours there are?"

"Mint, raspberry, peanut butter… you can get almost every flavour on the planet. But anyway, enough of that. Let's bring in the next trainer! CrackandDance, would you please come in?" Flint said. The next trainer entered and moved to stand in front of Saturn. The trainer wore torn ragged clothes and looked like they had been washed in a muddy creek. The trainer's teeth were a brilliant shade of gold though. Fascinating combination. "I like the name, by the way. Two of my favourite things in the world!" He winked.

The trainer stared back. Awkward moment. "Ookay… you learn something new about your friends everyday… You may ask your questions."

"Yay, questions for Saturn! Okay, first question. If you were given the chance to screw a gym leader who would it be? It can be from any region."

Saturn thought hard. There were quite a few attractive gym leaders around the planet, but Maylene was the sexiest of them all. There was just something so sexy about a woman who could dominate him. She was also incredibly fit. He could feel himself hardening down below the more he thought about sexy Maylene. "Maylene from Sinnoh."

"What the…" said Cyrus.

"I always knew Maylene had to have a fan somewhere," Volkner commented. Flint sniggered.

"Do you find Malva from Kalos' elite four, sexually attractive?"

Saturn pulled thoughts of Maylene out of his mind and tried to recall what Malva looked like. An image of her appeared in his head. She had a pink hair and wore tight pants. Apparently, she worked part-time as a pole dancer. No wonder she had such a stunning physique although she wasn't as hot as Maylene. "She's all right," Saturn said.

"Just all right?" Volkner replied.

"She's like, on fire, man!"

"Of course you would say that, Flint. You are a Fire-type master too."

"Good point. I'd tap her anytime, but she won't come near me." Flint frowned.

The questions continued. "Would you rather be a member of Team Plasma or Team Flare?"

Team Flare members wore fashionable clothes while Team Plasma wore dorky ridiculous outfits. Well, not all the time – it depended on how much of a loser you were. The cooler grunts got to wear the skin-tight black clothes while the not-so-cool ones were forced to wear those clothes with the massive helmet thing that looked like it weighed a lot. "Uh, probably Team Flare just because they have cool clothes. Lysandre has a good taste in fashion… unlike the rest of them…" he muttered, shooting Cyrus a dark glare.

"You are meant to look ridiculous, that's the point," Cyrus replied. "Just be glad you don't have to have a bowl haircut."

"Seriously man, what's with the horrible haircuts?" Flint said.

Cyrus glared. "Like I said, the grunts are meant to look stupid."

"Thanks for the questions CrackandDance!" Volkner said. He waved and the trainer left the room. Saturn couldn't wait for this to be over. He really had to go and use the bathroom. Damn thoughts of Maylene. "ExtremelyCreativeUsername, please enter!"

The trainer skipped into the room and smiled. "Sooo, for Saturn… Are you aware that eighty-five percent of just about everyone I've asked thinks you're a girl?"

He grumbled and glared. "I'm not a girl!"

"It's the curvy hips, Saturn," Jupiter pointed out.

"And he gets his nails done once a month," Mars added.

"He also uses conditioner and expensive male moisturiser."

Saturn growled. "I take care of my appearance, all right? What's wrong with wanting to look good?" He cast a look in Charon's direction. "I could end up looking like that slob for Arceus' sake."

Flint nodded approvingly. "The man has a point. It's important to look hot."

"Where do you get your nails done?" Volkner asked.

"Jupiter does them for me, but I hear Johanna does them too down in Hearthome's Super Contest Hall."

Cyrus couldn't believe what he was wearing. What on earth was coming to the world? He knew he had a good reason for wanting to create a new universe in which effeminate men ceased to exist. "You people disgust me."

"Shut up, Cyrus," Flint, Volkner and Saturn chorused together. Cyrus rolled his eyes and shook his head sadly.

"Thanks for your questions ExtremelyCreativeUsername. Hope to see you again sometime!" Volkner said. He glanced down at the next name on the list. "ShinyPoochyena45, please enter!"

A cloud of Houndoom smoke (smoke which took the shape of a Houndoom) appeared from out of nowhere near Jupiter, causing the poor commander to gag. Two grunts rushed into the room after the smoke faded. The other commanders just looked at Jupiter. The smoke didn't appear to be harmless at least. That was a good thing though because they needed someone else aside from Charon to tease.

ShinyPoochyena45 rushed up and gave Saturn a hug and pulled away. "My name is Kat by the way. So, do you think Team Magma or Flare is better?"

"Flare members have better outfits, but Magma members have been around a little bit longer and seem to be a little more sane. At least they aren't part-time strippers." Saturn shuddered. Lysandre, his admins and his grunts sometimes travelled from region to region doing free strip shows for those in search of 'adult fun'.

"Who is the cutest out of Team Aqua's Shelly or Team Magma's Kat or Courtney?"

"Uh…" He knew he had to be careful here. Girls were easily offended over looks when it came to choosing one over the other. Kat was obviously the one standing in front of him so she was the safest one to choose since she was right there. "Kat has the cutest name and girls with cute names are often the cutest?" Saturn supplied, hoping he was safe from castration. Kat didn't seem offended at least. She smiled. He sighed with relief. He was going to live another day!

"Which is the most annoying of my Pokemon – Houndoom, Blaziken, Arcanine, Camerupt or Hydreigon?"

Houndooms were often annoying canines – he knew from experience because he often had to play 'throw the stick' with Pookie, Cyrus' Houndoom. Arcanine's were annoying as well when they cuddled up because their tails were so fluffy it was hard to breathe sometimes, but at least they weren't interested in fetching sticks. Blaziken had some pretty powerful legs, but he hadn't run into one yet to cast judgement. Camerupt's were slow and ugly and reminded him of Charon and Hydreigon's were nasty foul-tempered dragons with one too many heads. Ghetsis' Hydreigon was the nastiest of them all.

"Uh, probably Houndoom. Throwing a stick gets boring after awhile."

"Hey, that game is the best!" Flint said. "My Houndoom loves it."

"Try playing it with Cyrus' Houndoom, Pookie."

Cyrus frowned. "What's wrong with Pookie?"

Saturn glanced in his direction. "You don't want to know, boss."

"What would you do if we kidnapped, Jupiter?"

"She's like a sister to me so I'd be a little upset. Besides, who else is going to take nude photos of me?" Saturn answered. Charon raised his hand. Saturn stuck a finger down his throat and gagged then pulled it away. "Forget I asked. Can I please use the bathroom now?"

"Go ahead," Volkner said. "Actually, better yet, let's all get out so the cleaners can clean up the strawberry-flavoured blood." They all nodded. "Oh, by the way Mars, you're up next! I hope you are ready!"

Mars just nodded. What sort of questions would she be faced with this time?

.

Mars is next! Ask away! Keep the insanity going! Reviews are much appreciated, as always!


	8. Mars, Round Two

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to ExtremelyCreativeUsername, Pokmaster Ace, Twilightcrystalflame, ShinyPoochyena45 and ImAnAngel for reviewing the previous chapter!

.

**Chapter Eight: Mars, Round Two**

Mars stood before the group, wrapping her arms around her waist, waiting for the second round of humiliation to begin. Volkner gave her an approving nod while Flint just winked, causing Cyrus to send a death glare in both their directions. The duo weren't concerned at all though – they just smirked. "All right, Mars. You know the drill. Bertha is gonna flip the coin and you're going to have to lose something," Flint said, licking his bottom lip.

Bertha hobbled over to stand in front of Mars then flipped the coin. Mars drew in a deep breath – heads meant she'd lose her dress and tails meant… well, she'd lose her tights and that wouldn't be so bad. She'd feel a little bit cold, but it wasn't embarrassing or anything. It just meant everyone would get to her see legs.

"I really do not see the point of this activity…" Cyrus complained. "Being forced to see Saturn's… reproductive organs was a sight I could live without, but surely you do not mean to force the females to undergo the same humiliation?"

Saturn muttered something which sounded like, 'go screw yourself, boss'. Flint shook his head. "Sorry, but rules are rules. Besides, Mars is hot. Other than Cynthia, there are no other pretty girls to look at in our region."

"Don't let Cynthia hear you say that – she'll kick you out of the league," Volkner pointed out.

Flint cleared his throat, casting a nervous look in the direction of the door. Fortunately there was no sign of Cynthia at all. He turned back to Bertha. "Heads or tails, Bertha?"

She glanced down at the coin on her arm. "Tails!"

"Of course she gets the better option…" Saturn murmured.

Mars shrugged and removed her tights, throwing them away to the left. All the eyes in the room were drawn to her legs. "Damn…" commented Flint, whistling appreciatively. "She's got great legs!"

Mars shifted uncomfortably. It was cold. She knew there was a good reason why she wore them in the first place. "Can we just get started with the questions?"

Flint managed to pull his gaze away and nodded, glancing down at the list on his palm. "ExtremelyCreativeUsername, please enter the room!"

ExtremelyCreativeUsername returned and moved to stand in front of Mars. "If you had to have a relationship with someone who wasn't Cyrus, who would it be?"

Mars glanced up to the right, thinking about the other males in the universe. Cyrus was her favourite male and no other guy would ever match up to him, but if he didn't exist… "Hmm, I'm not sure really since the boss is so perfect… but if I had to choose… maybe… N? He seems pretty cute and naive. He'd be easy to dominate… er, I mean, he seems like he'd be an interesting guy to be with.

"N?" Cyrus repeated.

"Don't worry boss, I'll never leave you."

Saturn stuck some fingers down his throat and gagged. How repulsive. Jupiter just rolled her eyes while Charon placed his hands over his heart and sighed. Volkner leaned over and whispered something to Flint who smirked.

ExtremelyCreativeUsername spoke again. "Also, just to be annoying, what's your most embarrassing moment?"

There were heaps of those moments, thought Mars. Every week there seemed to be something new. She tried to think of the most embarrassing of those moments but each of them seemed just as embarrassing as the other. As she thought of something to mention, her lovely teammates brought up amusing stories.

"Remember the time when Mars was introduced to the company and she slipped on stage? Her skirt flew up and we learnt Mars likes G-strings?" Jupiter called, smirking at the memory. Mars' face started to burn.

Saturn chuckled. "Or what about the time we caught her having a sex dream about the boss? We captured it all on tape!" His grin widened.

Mars' face reddened further. And she thought they were her friends… She threw in Saturn's direction and flipped him her middle finger. Saturn just laughed in response. Her face continued to burn hot. She felt like her face was going to burst into flames within any second.

"There was also that time we caught her sleep-walking and she tumbled down the stairs," Jupiter added. Charon joined in their laughter. "And there was that time when we were down at the beach and Mars lost the top half of her bikini."

"That was a great day," Saturn said.

"Oh and there was also that time when we all went fishing and Mars got her foot stuck in the fish hook and the boss had to yank it out," Charon added. The other Galactic commanders were red in the face with laughter now. Even Flint and Volkner found themselves giggling uncontrollably.

Mars' face was so red it matched her hair now. "I have lots of embarrassing moments… They've pretty much told you the major ones." She was totally going to convince Cyrus to dock their pay for their next month after their traitorous comments.

ExtremelyCreativeUsername nodded and flashed Mars a big smile. "Thanks for answering!" The trainer left the room.

Flint and Volkner managed to stop laughing long enough to summon the next trainer in. "Pokmaster Ace! Please enter the room!" Volkner called out. It didn't rain blood this time, but blood did trickle out down the right side of Mars' mouth. Her eyes widened.

"What the…" she murmured.

The blood dripped down onto the floor, forming a large puddle at her feet. The puddle turned the shape of a human moments later much to the surprise of everyone in the room. "He's a magician!" Charon said. "What an amazing spectacle! You must teach me how you did that!"

He was ignored, but that was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Would Saturn make a more obedient pet cat than Purugly?"

Mars nodded. "Yes, he's very obedient. He's a good boy."

Saturn rolled his eyes. "… I'm not a cat…"

She walked over and patted him on the head. "Good, kitty-kat…"

Saturn didn't bother trying to fight back. He was a good boy.

"Are you a sado masochist?"

Mars smirked. "Well, it's true I like suffering and watching others suffer." She glanced in Cyrus' direction. He looked uncomfortable all of a sudden. She turned back to Pokmaster Ace and nodded. "What can I say? It's a turn on."

"What a girl…" said Flint.

Volkner elbowed him in the ribs. "Pervert."

"You were thinking it too."

"…Maybe… but that's not the point."

"How would you react if someone bit you and began drinking your blood, 'cause I'm thirsty."

Mars raised an eyebrow. "Uh? I'd politely ask you not to? You know, drinking blood isn't healthy unless you're a vampire. Blood is salty."

"And how would you like it if every time I appear to ask you questions, I crawl out of your mouth?"

"Disturbed?"

Saturn snorted. "Are you sure you want to hide in her mouth, you know, considering the things that have been in there and all." Mars picked up her tights and threw over Saturn's head. He panicked, threw them off, and fell off his chair. Everyone laughed at Saturn's misfortune.

"See you next time then." Pokmaster Ace collapsed into a puddle of blood and somehow made his way back into her mouth. There were comments of, 'ew, that's disgusting' from all members present. Surprisingly, Mars felt no pain. It was like drinking water.

Flint wiped his forehead. "That was plain freaky… Anyway, let's call in the next trainer! Twilightcrystalflame, please come in!" A trainer with waist length red hair and demonic bat wings flew into the room. The trainer ran up to Flint, punched him randomly on the arm and cackled, as if they were possessed. The laughter ended within seconds. Now the trainer looked sad and apologetic.

"Uh…" said Volkner, edging away.

"I won't hurt you," said the trainer. It would've been a sincere response too if not for the maniacal grin in their eyes. Twilightcrystalflame stood in front of Mars. "How old are you?"

"I'm twenty-one!"

"She's the baby in the group," Jupiter said. "But then again, we're all under thirty years of age except for Charon of course."

"What was the best day of your life?"

The best day of her life? Hmm, she thought, reflecting on her recent history. Joining Team Galactic was a great day and becoming friends with people who actually cared about her well-being was nice as well, but the best day had to be losing her virginity to the man she was obsessed with. It had taken quite a number of years to achieve it, but it had happened. "The best day in my life was convincing the boss to sleep with me. We did it on his table." She sighed happily, while everyone else (except for Cyrus naturally) looked sick.

"I am never touching that table again…" Saturn murmured.

"Who would you do out of Tabitha, Proton, Matt, Archer, N or Colress?"

Mars thought hard. "N. I could teach him a lot of things. It'd be fun to corrupt his innocent mind. The other trainers you mentioned are not my type."

"Are you related to Maxie, Silver or Ariana?"

"I'm not related to Maxie or Silver, but I do have a connection to Ariana. She's my older sister, but I never got to spend too much time with her. Our parents separated you see, and she had to move to Johto while I taken to Sinnoh," Mars explained. She actually didn't know too much about Ariana other than she worked for Team Rocket.

"My final question. Would you have sex with Jupiter and Saturn if you became an instant millionaire after?"

Of course there was going to be a sex question involving her fellow commanders soon. Mars turned around and looked at Jupiter and Saturn then shook her head. "I don't need the money anymore since the boss just gives me whatever I want, but if I wasn't a member of Team Galactic, and I had no other way of getting money, I probably would have a threesome with them. Well, maybe not so much with Jupiter…"

"Bitch," muttered Jupiter.

"Ladies, ladies, please save the fighting for later," Flint said. "Be sure to invite me to watch though!" Everyone just looked at him oddly. He frowned. "What? I like watching girls fight. There's so much hair-pulling and scratching, it's funny."

"Moving on…" said Volkner. "Thanks for the questions, Twilightcrystalflame!" The trainer flapped their wings and flew out of the room. Seconds later ShinyPoochyena45 walked into the room, her faithful Houndoom following behind her.

"Are you really related to my boss? He told me to ask."

Mars shook her head. "Not related. My hair is a deeper shade of red than his."

ShinyPoochyena looked at Cyrus, held back a laugh then turned to Mars. Whatever question the girl had in mind was obviously something to do with the boss. "What is the length of Cyrus' dong?"

"Not this again…" Cyrus muttered. "What do you think about at night?"

Mars flashed the girl a big smile. "Well, he's around the seven inch mark."

Saturn glanced down at his. "I'm only a five…" He shook his head sadly and covered himself up.

Charon snorted. "You think that's bad? At least you're in the average bracket. I'm under that." He hung his head low, embarrassed.

"I think I'm a six," Volkner said.

"Six and a half for me," Flint added.

"Whoa," Mars said, holding her hands up. "This isn't the 'who has the biggest sausage' competition."

"That's true," Jupiter said. "Besides, anything bigger than eight inches hurts."

"Can we please move on?" Mars said.

"What is my most annoying Pokemon? Houndoom, Arcanine, Blaziken, Camerupt or Hydreigon?"

"I've never met your Pokemon before, but I'd say Blaziken. It's not a lot of fun when a Pokemon kicks your bathroom door down while you are having a shower," Mars said.

"Would you ever join Team Magma if Galactic wasn't around?"

Mars shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'd rather join Team Rocket, you know, because my older sister is there. Nothing against Team Magma. I mean, red is awesome, but Team Rocket sell aphrodisiacs in the form of Slowpoke Tail juice." Not that she ever took them to use, but she did take them to sell to the grunts.

Before ShinyPoochyeana45 left the room, she gave Saturn and Flint cards. "Saturn, that's my number and Flint, that's my work number. Be sure to call me!" she said then skipped out of the room before anyone could ask her further questions.

"I learnt a lot during the past few minutes," said Volkner.

"You know, apparently a survey was issued a few months ago asking males about their sizes," Flint added. He fell silent for a few moments deep in thought then shook himself out of it. "ImAnAngel, please enter the room!"

A trainer with angel-like wings and devilish horns entered the room. It was an intimidating sight. The wings were pretty though, thought Mars, but she wasn't so sure about the horns. Wouldn't that hurt? ImAnAngel approached Mars. "Would you rather see Flint or Volkner naked?"

Mars turned her head to study Flint and Volkner. Volkner was the better looking of the pair, but Flint seemed more laidback going by nature. Flint was also larger in the downstairs department… or so he claimed anyway. "Hmm… probably Volkner. Sorry Flint, but I just have a fetish for guys with spiky hair."

Flint's shoulders slumped. "That's what my last girlfriend said…"

"Sorry, man," said Volkner.

"What's your reaction if you caught Cyrus and Jupiter in the act of 'babymaking'?

The thought of Jupiter shagging her man made her blood boil. Jupiter sleeping with Cyrus? Not as long as she lived. She curled her fingers into fists. "I would gouge her eyes out, shave all her hair off and force her to run around the Galactic building with her clothes off." She jerked her head in Jupiter's direction and brought a finger to her neck, pretending to cut her own throat. "You touch him and you die."

"Okay then…" Jupiter said.

"Would you rather lie with N or Lysandre?"

With all the questions that were being asked of her relating to sleeping with people, did people think she was some whore? She took in a deep breath and answered the question. "They're both softies, but I'm still going to stick with N. Lysandre has probably been around the block a bit, but I doubt N has. So yeah, I'd choose N."

"What is it about N that the girls like?" Mars heard Flint mutter.

"It must be his _Neverland _show. Girls like flowers and cute fluffy animals."

Flint looked thoughtful, as if he were considering the idea himself. "Hm… Thanks for the questions, ImAnAngel! Hope you have a good day." He waved. The trainer exited the room. Both Volkner and Flint looked at Cyrus. "You are next. This is certainly going to be… interesting."

Mars returned to her position. Cyrus grumbled and made his way to the centre. How many more rounds of this were there going to be?

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Yay, Cyrus is next! As always, reviews (in this case, questions) are much appreciated! On a side note, would anyone be interested in reading a one shot about Mars' embarrassing moments?


	9. Cyrus, Round Two

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Stan King, Hashtag, In The Forest, Sailor Taichichi Vegeta, Pokmaster Ace, DapieisTasty, GamerGirl54321, ExtremelyCreativeUsername, Twilightcrystalflame, ShinyPoochyena45 and CrackandDance for leaving questions for Cyrus! Thank you all so much!

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**Chapter Nine: Cyrus, Round Two**

Cyrus stood in the middle of the room waiting for the coin flipping event to happen. This entire thing was ridiculous, but he didn't have a choice. Damn this questions and answers event to the very bottom level of hell. He could be doing other important things right now like fixing up his iTunes playlist or playing _Monopoly _against the computer.

Bertha stepped forward and grinned at him, revealing yellow teeth. Cyrus took a step back – Cynthia chose these people to represent the Elite Four? What was wrong with the girl? "You are wasting time, old lady."

She stopped smiling and flipped the coin. As usual, she managed to catch it. "Heads!"

"Of course the boss lands the safe option," Saturn muttered.

Heads. Well, it could have been so much worse. He removed his jacket and put it down in a safe corner, far away from everyone else then moved back to his position. He was aware the other people in the room felt disappointed because he got away with full embarrassment. There was nothing more satisfying to a Galactic commander than watching the boss suffer. Not this time sadly.

"All right, let's get a move on. I feel Cyrus may try to kill us if we don't get things moving," Volkner said. He coughed into his hand then called the first trainer on the list. "CrackandDance! Please enter the room!" The hobo from Saturn's session returned, but this time the hobo had upgraded their appearance. The hobo wore shades, bling bling and other various pieces of jewellery. How the hell did a hobo get that much money?

"What would be your reaction if you got kicked out of Team Galactic and Saturn would be the one to replace you?" said the hobo. The hobo grinned, revealing horrible yellow teeth.

Cyrus sighed. "I would not be kicked out of Team Galactic – I would leave on my own terms. Saturn would not be allowed to take over because the rights are under my name. If he took over, I'd take him to court and ensure he was left with nothing."

"Thanks, boss. You're so nice to me."

Cyrus ignored Saturn. He was always so whiny, so demanding. The guy couldn't even look after the café he was managing when Cyrus recruited him – what made the stupid male think he could run a successful company like Galactic?

"Are you related to Giovanni?"

"Let me ask you a question – do I look like Giovanni at all?" he retorted.

"Cyrus, you are being questioned. Not the trainer. Answer the question!" Volkner ordered.

CrackandDance looked at him, tapping their foot. He sighed again, irritated. "No, I'm not." Thank goodness for that. If he was related to Giovanni, he'd be related to that idiotic boy, Silver. Why the hell was he called Silver anyway when his hair wasn't even grey? Maybe Giovanni was colour blind.

"What would be your reaction if you caught Mars lying with N?"

Like that would ever happen. Mars was loyal to him and often told him, she was his bitch and whore. She'd never abandon him for that idiot unless he had somehow drugged her or cast some magical spell. "I would have him disciplined," Cyrus replied. "He would be whipped then be forced to have a vasectomy." No one messed with him… if they did, they would be suitably punished.

"That's it from me! Thanks for answering my questions!" said the hobo, giving Cyrus another smile. The trainer skipped away. All the males in the room took a few steps back from Cyrus, afraid he might decide to inflict some form of punishment on them afterwards.

"ShinyPoochyena45, please enter the room!" Flint said, hands covering his crotch just encase Cyrus snapped.

ShinyPoochyena45 stood in front of Cyrus. "Let's have a Houndoom battle!"

Cyrus shook his head. "I do not have my Pokemon on me – they were removed at the security gates before we came in just encase we tried to escape. Besides, Pookie would defeat you." Pookie was the greatest of all Houndooms. He had been rescued from the canine pound because Cyrus wanted a dog to attack his grunts if they failed to carry out a task successfully.

"Okay then… What is your opinion of Maxie?"

"I hate him."

"Cyrus, explain your reasons," Flint said.

"He's an idiot."

"Not good enough."

He suppressed a growl. "He didn't turn up for my twenty-first birthday." All the other bosses did except for Maxie who claimed he was on holiday. The truth was the guy was actually trying to get a suntan and failing miserably. Ever since that day, Cyrus decided Maxie wasn't worth his 'friendship'.

"What would you do if Team Magma kidnapped Mars?"

"I would have to … negotiate with Maxie to release Mars back into my care. I will forgive him for not attending my birthday party and I will offer him Saturn or Jupiter for a month to do as he pleases with them if he returns Mars to me." It wasn't like Jupiter and Saturn were of much use to him anyway.

"That's harsh, man," said Flint.

Jupiter sniffed. "That's normal for him. If he's being nice to us then we know we should be worried."

"Which is the most annoying of my Pokemon? Arcanine, Houndoom, Blaziken, Hydreigon or Camerupt?"

This question again? How the hell was he supposed to answer it if he had not encountered this trainer's Pokemon before? These people were obviously born just to piss him off as if it were somehow amusing to make him suffer. "I do not know and I do not care." He crossed his arms and glared.

Bertha stormed over, withdrew a hand then slapped it across his cheek. He winced, taken by surprise. The old lady didn't look like much but she could sure hit hard. "Answer the question!" she roared.

"Oh, Bertha, you are so brave!" Charon exclaimed.

Cyrus frowned. Witch, he thought sourly. "Hydreigon. Three heads, three times the irritation."

"What's up with the boss today? He's more snappy than usual," Saturn said.

"Sexual frustration. He hasn't had any for a few days now since we've been locked up in this building for awhile," Mars said, shrugging. "He tends to get grumpy when he hasn't had any for a couple of days." She gave him a sympathetic look. "Just hang in there, boss!"

"I can totally sympathize… I went without it for a whole month," Volkner said, shaking his head sadly, as if deeply pained by his confession. "It was the worst month of my life…"

Flint patted him on the shoulder, trying to console his friend. "There, there."

Volkner sniffed. "Thanks for your questions ShinyPoochyena45. Hope to see you in the future! Twilightcrystalflame, please enter the room!"

Cyrus recognized that name as well. The bipolar one. The trainer entered the room, this time dressed in a black cloak which had blood splatters on it. The trainer also had gotten some contact lenses – glowy ruby ones. One of the wings appeared broken as well, preventing the trainer from flying.

"How did you lose your emotions?"

Cyrus drew in a deep breath then sighed heavily. "I never did, sadly." Stupid emotions. It didn't matter how hard he pretended not to give a damn, those damn feelings always surfaced. "I grew up believing emotions were weak. The relationship I had with my parents wasn't a positive one and you could say it influenced me." To put in it more blunt terms, he hated them and they hated him. "I was told touching Mesprit would solve all my problems and remove feelings, but it… er… didn't go out as planned."

"He discovered touching Mesprit would make it easier to hide emotions, but it comes at a cost. For some reason, Mesprit heightens libido," Charon supplied, causing Saturn to chuckle. And that was why he found himself in a sexual relationship with Mars.

"Would you rather have Dialga or Palkia?"

"Diagla," answered Cyrus, without sparing much thought. "Blue is a good colour."

Saturn grinned. "Yeah, I agree with him for once. Pink is _girl's _colour."

"Hey, I like pink," said Charon, frowning.

"You like everything, Charon," Jupiter pointed out, rolling her eyes.

"If Mars way away and you were feeling horny, who would you screw?"

Of course. Another question about his sex life. People were perverted. "Johanna."

Mars frowned. "Johanna?"

"Dawn's mother," Saturn supplied. "She's a part-time pole dancer now."

Cyrus was aware Mars was glaring daggers at him. He turned around to assure her that he didn't the girl over her. "Do not worry, Mars. You have my loyalty. This would only occur in desperation situations." Mars relaxed.

"Why do you look like you're forty?"

Cyrus frowned, somewhat offended. "I'm not that old looking… am I?"

"You need to smile more, boss. He's still working on it," Mars said, giving him a big smile, flashing her pearly whites. "Have to take him to smile therapy classes."

He grunted. "It's stress. You try running a company with a bunch of morons and see how you feel in a couple of years time." Trying hard to feel nothing for a number of years also made him look older. Either that or the cameras just weren't doing him justice.

"And finally, do you have any fetishes?"

"He likes tight clothing on women!" Mars exclaimed before Cyrus could say that he didn't have any fetishes. Looking over his shoulder, he sent a look that read, 'I thought I told you to keep quiet about that'. Mars just smiled, flipping a strand of red hair away from her face. "It's true though, boss. I mean, look at our uniforms. Look at the uniforms Jupiter and I have to wear. You just have to draw attention to the chest area don't you, boss?" she teased.

"What about my tight pants?" Saturn said.

"You have womanly legs," Jupiter pointed out. "Normal pants would look weird on you because of your body shape."

Saturn started to cry.

Flint and Volkner waved the trainer out. The next trainer came in and stood directly in front of Cyrus. He took a few step backs. Personal space was important. Only a few selected people could step inside that bubble. "Hello there DapiesisTasty!" Volkner said. "Ask your questions!"

The trainer nodded. "What is your IQ?"

"High," he replied. "Three digits." The exact numbers weren't important to him – all that mattered was that he was smarter than the average person. All the people he had recruited had to take an IQ test just to make sure he wouldn't be outsmarted. Charon was probably the only person in Galactic who was close to his level.

"How many people have you slept with?"

He arched a brow. Was his personal life that important for people to know? "Two."

"Two?" Mars said.

The other trainers were just as shocked.

"There was a time when I was a teenager…" Cyrus started.

"Oh I think I know where this is going," Flint said.

"It better not be one of those sappy teenage love stories. I like the ones where they are both drunk," Volkner added. "Which reminds me of that time at Crasher Wake's beer bong party where Maylene…" He was interrupted by a shake of the head by Flint.

"No one wants to hear that story." Flint turned to Cyrus again. "Go on."

Cyrus suppressed a growl. This was embarrassing. "Her name was Johanna. She drugged me." Everyone started laughing. That was just so unexpected. They expected him to do the drugging – not the other way around. "I don't remember anything else other than that." All he knew was that he had been forced into doing the deed with a female called Johanna who lived in Twinleaf Town.

"Do you enjoy nibbling your tongue?"

He frowned. "No."

"And finally, who would you sleep with if you were gay?"

Again with the sex questions! That just confirmed it – most trainers were perverts. No wonder so many of them lost battles – they were probably getting distracted by sexual thoughts instead of focusing on the actual battle. He sighed, raking a hand through his hair and answered the question. "One of the bosses from a different team – I might be able to extract some useful information from them."

The trainer nodded. "That's all." The trainer exited the room. How much longer would this take? He thought. This seemed to be taking much longer than before.

"GamerGirl54321, would you please enter the room!" Volkner said.

Moments later, a female trainer entered. Last time Cyrus didn't get to see much of the trainer thanks to the robe, but now he could see that she looked like a normal person. She had brown hair and matching brown eyes and dressed in a grey and pink sweatshirt and shorts. The moment the trainer smiled though, he realized there was no such thing as 'normal'. This trainer had knife-sharp demon teeth.

"Let's a get move on!" She skipped over to stand in front of him. "What would you do if you got kidnapped by N and forced to do it with Lysandre?"

Have sex with Lysandre? That was the first boss on his 'to-destroy' list. Lysandre was an overemotional being who loved beautiful things like fluffy toys and cute animals. He was like an older fashionable version of N with crazy hair. "I would find a way to send them both to the Distortion World."

"Someone pushes you off a cliff naked to your death. What is your last thought?"

"I would think, 'why am I naked'?" Who jumped to their death naked anyway? A drunk? A nudist? He was neither of those things.

"What would you do if you stumbled upon a bunch of unicorns having a dance party on your lawn while the Sunflower from Plants vs. zombies was singing "There's a Zombie On Your Lawn" and a rodeo clown was selling Post-It shaped popsicles and then EVERYBODY DID THE FLOP and then Psy came in and sang Gangnam Style?

Cyrus frowned. He thought everyone else was crazy, but this girl brought new meaning to the term 'crazy'. "I do not understand any of those references you have just mentioned." He was glad he didn't either. It sounded like a crazy world to be in. The trainer just shook her head, said something about 'what an idiot' then rushed out of the room.

"ExtremelyCreativeUsername, would you please enter the room!" Flint demanded.

The door burst open. Last time the trainer seemed normal, but this time it was like she had taken some drugs or something because she was running around all over the place, all hyped up, her blonde hair bouncing up and down as she ran. "So Cyrus!" she said, standing in front of him, giving him a crooked smile. "Which legendary would you have out of Arceus, Palkia, Diagla or Giratina?"

"Arceus. He created them and therefore has control. Taking Arceus would mean I would automatically have control of the others as well."

"What made you go all evil, anyway?"

He frowned, offended. "I'm not evil. I was simply doing what I believed was the right thing to do. I had good intentions." He sighed again. "My parents put me on the path."

"And what's YOUR most embarrassing moment?"

His list of embarrassing moments was thankfully not as lengthy as Mars' list since he was usually pretty careful about doing things. What one could he share with the rest of the group? "My most embarrassing moment occurred when I was cursed with bad luck for twenty four hours. I fell up the stairs."

"Liar!" Charon said.

"Yeah, boss. That's like the most minor embarrassing moment that happened. Remember when you accidentally got your tool stuck in the zipper?" Mars pointed out. "I had to help you!"

"Ouch!" Volkner said. Flint cringed.

Of course Mars would remember that. "And there was the warp panel incident. Jupiter was playing around with them and they somehow took us directly to his bathroom," Saturn added.

Note to self, remove warp panel from room, Cyrus thought. Thankfully, since the curse lifted, his embarrassing moments were minor things.

ExtremelyCreativeUsername grinned. "Sounds like material for someone to use in a story." She exited the room with a bounce in her step. People actually wrote stories about stuff like that? What the fuck?

"Stan Kong, please enter!"

The ceiling opened. A purple Slacking with a jetpack flew down from the opening, landing in front of Cyrus. "Have you heard?"

"Heard what?"

The trainer started singing a couple of lines of 'Surfin' Bird' by The Trashmen. He only knew the title because Charon was playing it the other day. Cyrus was very confused. Well, look on the bright side, he told himself, at least it wasn't a sex question.

The trainer started up the jetback and flew through the opening. The ceiling doors closed. "Hashtag, please enter!" Flint said. "Hashtag, that's unusual name for a trainer. You know what would be funny? If a trainer called themselves 'Sexbutt'." No one else laughed. Flint cleared his throat. "Um… moving on."

A man wearing a banana suit entered the room, waving a pink and white maraca in the air. Music with the lyrics, 'Peanut Butter Jelly Time' played as the man danced. What was this? Some tropical island hell? "Is your real name Uranus?" Saturn snickered.

Cyrus shook his head. "No. That was the name of another commander who I had recruited. She did not stay for very long because of the name-calling."

"Who would be a better pet, Jean from Attack on Titan or Saturn?"

Cyrus didn't know what a Jean from Attack on Titan was so he just went with Saturn. Saturn was easy to boss around since he was a suck up. He'd do anything to please him. "Saturn." Saturn did a dance. Cyrus shut him up with a glare. "Do not mistake that for me regarding you highly." Saturn stopped dancing and went back to pouting.

"Have you ever had an awkward return of a why boner?"

"No."

"Don't lie, boss. All us guys get that problem every now and then," Saturn said.

He rubbed his nose. "Fine. Yes."

"I'm so glad I'm female," Mars said.

"Can I call you, brother?"

"No. We are not related."

"Doesn't matter, I'm still going to call you brother."

Cyrus rolled his eyes. "That is all, yes?" Hashtag nodded. He waved goodbye to Flint and Volkner and exited. A few moments later trainer In The Forest entered. The Lake Guardians were following the trainer and immediately trapped him in a circle. Cyrus did not move. He feared they'd whisk him away to N's Neverland world if he moved a muscle.

"Ask your questions, In The Forest!" said Volkner.

"Parents or grandparents in Sunyshore?"

"Parents died in Sunyshore and grandparents still live there," Cyrus answered.

"Did you know Volkner when you were younger?" The trainer glanced at Volkner who grinned.

Cyrus nodded. "Unfortunately, yes. He was a brat then and he's still a brat now."

Volkner snickered. "You're just upset because I turned your Christmas lights off one day."

Cyrus ignored him. There was no point in arguing with fools. "Who did you first get laid with?"

Again with the sex questions. He really ought to start charging people a fee everytime they asked him about his sex life. "Johanna." He was forced to go fishing with his grandparents over at Lake Verity one day and Johanna just happened to be fishing as well. She ended up with getting a hook stuck in foot and he helped her get it out. She drugged him after that and they ended up doing it.

"Thanks for answering my questions!" The trainer exited.

"I never thought you were into Christmas, Volkner," Flint said. "How come you never bought me a present?"

Volkner looked guilty. "You are an Elite Four member. I shouldn't have to buy you presents. That's Cynthia's job as Champion."

Flint rubbed his chin. "True… Nevermind. Sailor Taichichi Vegeta, please come in!"

"Dear Cyrus… What do you get up to when you meet with the other team bosses?"

The last time he met with the other bosses they ended up playing a violent game of _Call of Duty _while drinking a couple of beers. Video games and beer equalled a good mix. It was even better when one person was drunk so everyone could make fun of them. Archie was such a character. For a pirate, he couldn't handle his alcohol well at all.

"We play games, usually ones on the console. Sometimes we talk about the idiots around us and come up with ideas to make their lives even more miserable. Every now and then, we'll have a drinking contest. Archie is usually the first to lose. Ghetsis surprisingly has a high tolerance to alcohol." The guy was a champion. He could mix drinks all day long and still be doing better than the rest of them.

"Since your commanders are sometimes at each other's throats, have you considered team-building exercises?"

Cyrus turned to face his group of loyal commanders. They smiled. He frowned. "I have considered making them carry out team-building exercises for adults but it seems to challenging for them. I may consider taking them to team-building exercises for kids instead."

"That would be great, boss! We could play, 'pass the hula-hoop'!" Saturn exclaimed.

"Or the human knot!" Charon added.

"Wheelbarrow race!" Jupiter added.

"Group orgy!" said Mars. Everyone (except for Cyrus) looked at her. She frowned. "What? We'll get to know each other a bit more."

Cyrus shook his head. Idiots. "See you later then," Sailor Taichichi Vegeta said. The trainer walked out of the room.

"The final trainer for this session is, Pokmaster Ace!" read Flint.

Thank Arceus, thought Cyrus. He was wondering if this was ever going to end. He was getting sick and tired of standing around waiting for trainers to ask their questions. Pokmaster Ace entered and the trainer seemed to be joining in the Magma bandwagon because he had taken to wearing a red jacket with their symbol on the back. What was so cool about Magma anyway? Archie was a heroin addict and got off on porn.

The ceiling opened and a flock of Murkrows entered the room. Cyrus started up blood and feathers for about three minutes until a Murkrow with blood red eyes crawled out. The bird transformed into the trainer and Cyrus stopped coughing, surprised he wasn't actually in the process of dying. In fact, he felt no pain at all. A Murkrow sat on the trainer's shoulder.

"Are you a gigolo?"

Sounded like a name for a new type of jelly. "A gigolo?"

"A male prostitute, boss. They service wealthy women," Saturn explained.

Ah, so someone like Lysandre then, he thought. "No. I am not a male prostitute nor will I ever stoop that low," Cyrus said.

"So, why did you invent Team Galactic?"

"I couldn't do everything on my own unfortunately. I needed a large group of people to carry out the dirty work so I wouldn't have to do it.

"Lazy boss," Jupiter muttered.

"…would probably make more money being a toilet cleaner…" Saturn murmured.

"Are you emo?"

"No. Emo is short for emotional and I am not an overly emotional being."

"And finally, what were you doing in a porn studio when you first met Jupiter?"

Everyone looked at him with newfound interest. It was a good question. Why was he chilling at a porn studio anyway? He raked a hand through his hair. "I was looking for a new investment. Sex makes a lot of money. I just happened to find Jupiter there at the time and I thought she'd like to work for me." The real truth was that he was feeling kinda needy that day and was looking for a cheap whore since he hadn't recruited Mars yet. But they didn't need to know that.

The trainer suddenly exploded into a cluster of Murkrows. The birds flew around Cyrus, cawing loudly in the trainer's voice then swooped at Mars, stopping a few inches away from her face. They melted into pools of blood. That guy certainly knew how to put on a show, thought Cyrus.

"We really need to do something that cleans up blood quickly…" said Flint. "Anyway, that's it for you Cyrus. You can go back to the others now. Charon, you are up next and for the love of Arceus, I hope you are wearing boxers or briefs on. We really do not need to see your tool."

Charon happily skipped over. "I'm ready!"

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Since the story has grown dramatically in popularity over the last few chapters, I'm cutting questions down to three per person again. As always, reviews are much appreciated (as are your questions)!

Random advert – ExtremelyCreativeUsername and myself have teamed up to write a one shot about Cyrus, Mars and Jupiter getting stuck in a lift together. I invite you to check it out! It's called 'Elevator Love' and it's on my profile. Go check out her stories too because she also writes Galactic-based stories.

Also, I've started a Pokemon Fanfiction Group on Facebook! Link is on my profile page for those interested in discussing Pokemon stuff.


	10. Charon, Round Two

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Pokemaster Ace, Neptune, Stan Kong, buttsex, DapieisTasty, Zarbapha, CrackandDance, ShinyPoochyena45 and GamerGirl54321 for reviewing the previous chapter! I am overwhelmed by the amount of support for this story – the first two chapters had nothing (I ended up making random questions for myself to answer), and now this! Thank you all so much :D You guys are the best!

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**Chapter Ten: Charon, Round Two**

Volkner and Flint started the next round of questions immediately. The session was supposed to be held at an earlier time, but one of the members in the room had an accident in the toilets. As a result, they had to push the session back much to the frustration of the fans waiting outside the room. "All right, let's get this show on the road! Charon, we know you want to take your pants off, but no one wants to go blind. You can remove that lab coat of yours off," Volkner said. Everyone, but Charon and Bertha, sighed with relief.

Charon was a little disappointed with that, but he wasn't going to argue with the two hosts. He gave his lab coat to Bertha then moved to the middle of the room to face questioning time. The first trainer entered. He was male with purple eyes and had indigo-coloured hair that reached down to his knees. He was wearing a jacket that looked quite similar to the one Cyrus wore. In addition, he wore black baggy leather pants and black loaders. Charon tilted his head to the side, trying to determine how old this person was. He looked like he was ten.

"I'm Neptune. Why are you an old pervert?"

Charon frowned. "I am not an old pervert. I am just admiring good genetics, that's all. You can't blame me, can you?" There were just too many good-looking people around, like the woman on his team. Cyrus had good taste when it came to choosing woman to represent his company. It's why Charon was so eager to join up in the first place. Hot women.

"Who was your first time?"

"I really don't want to know…" Volkner muttered.

Charon thought hard. "Agatha!"

Everyone started laughing then they stopped when they realized Charon was actually serious. Agatha? That old cow? "Sometimes I wonder why I recruited you…" Cyrus muttered.

"You hired me so you could screw Mars while I did your dirty work," Charon explained. Cyrus fell silent. He couldn't argue with that point.

"How do you feel about my father?" Neptune said, jerking his head towards Cyrus who rolled his eyes and gave an exasperated sigh.

Charon turned to look at Cyrus. "I think he's a narcissistic, stark raving mad lunatic who likes having way too much hair gel. I also think he should smile a lot more so our team looks more presentable," Charon explained. Cyrus didn't bother arguing back. Neptune nodded and left the room and was soon replaced by the next trainer. The trainer wore a black hooded robe.

"I'm Stan Kong. My first question is this – are you a dirty old pervert?"

Again with the pervert accusations! It had to do with his look. Perhaps he ought to take one of the girls with him to the shops so they could choose some flattering clothes to make him look less creepy. "I'm old, but I'm not dirty, all right?" Charon said. The other Galactic members snorted. No one believed him. "If anyone here is a pervert, it's Saturn and the boss!"

"Do not give me false labels," Cyrus said.

Saturn smiled. "I know, right?"

Jupiter and Mars moved their chairs away from Saturn. Flint shook his head. "Too many perverts and not enough brothels and strip bars to satisfy them all." Volkner also shook his head saddened by that piece of information. Cynthia really ought to change that.

"Do you use a Gardevoir costume when you do the Frikle Frakle?"

"Frickle Frackle?"

Cyrus shook his head. "Don't look at me."

Flint cleared his throat. "I believe I can explain. It's a popular term on the online blogging community used to describe the act of sexual intercourse." Everyone turned to look at Flint. Even Volkner was surprised.

"What the? I thought it was a secret code word for doing the chicken dance," Volkner admitted.

"Nah, its sex. Children and teenagers used it so the parents don't know what they're snickering out," Flint explained."

Charon nodded. So that's what it meant. "I do not use a Gardevoir costume, but I do use a Rotom one when the chance arises."

Saturn gagged. "He's still having sex?"

"He was making out with Bertha a couple of days ago," Jupiter pointed out. Bertha smiled. Jupiter shuddered.

"Fair point," Saturn replied.

"Have you heard?" Stan Kong burst into song, singing the lyrics to 'Surfin Bird', as the trainer danced out of the room. Charon wasn't sure if that was supposed to be rhetorical question, but he was glad he didn't have to answer it since he wasn't sure how to. The next trainer walked in. Another male, but this guy didn't try to dress up like Cyrus' long lost twin. He wore a simple tee shirt and a pair of jeans.

"Why don't you go for immortality? I mean, wouldn't taking over the world take longer than just a few decades? And even if you did accomplish it, it wouldn't last for long. People and Pokemon would rise up. So why is your goal world domination? Immortality just seems better."

That was a good question and surprisingly not one related to sex which was odd considering the trainer's name. He had to think hard about that one. "Immortality does sound excellent, but I would still be susceptible to being murdered. I might live forever, but immortality isn't invulnerability. If I took control of the world I would at least be able to protect myself better," Charon explained, thinking he sounded quite smart. It didn't matter either way really – immortality or world domination; he would still die.

Buttsex nodded. "That's all." He exited the room.

The door opened and once again they were bombarded by Murkrows and lots of blood. Cyrus was beginning to tire of this, but at least this time he protected himself with a raincoat he stole off some poor kid earlier in the day. The others did not fare so well, except for Mars of course, since he had gotten one for her as well. There was only one person who could do this. Pokemaster Ace.

"Do you find any commander sexually attractive?"

Volkner raised his hand. "Mars."

"Mars," said Flint.

"He was asking me!" Charon snapped then turned around to examine his closest friends. Jupiter was rather voluptuous and had a fairly large chest, but Mars had a prettier face and a better body. Saturn looked like a girl and Cyrus was built like a tree – tall and sturdy. The answer was obvious. "I am a straight man and therefore I will say Jupiter and Mars are both sexually attractive. Saturn and Cyrus are not sexually appealing in my eyes." Unless of course that person happened to be attracted to trees and feminine males who wore skinny jeans. Jupiter and Mars both gagged.

"Who would win in a fight: Giovanni or my father, Maxie?"

Flint frowned. "I thought that ShinyPoochyena45 girl was related to Maxie? Are you telling me Maxie is a pimp?" What was it with redheads anyway getting around the block and receiving heaps of action? He must've been the only redhead in existence who wasn't getting laid.

Pokmaster Ace shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe we're related somehow."

"I would say Giovanni would win. The guy is quite big and he wears the most blinding suits," Charon answered, remembering that one image he found of Giovanni in that hideous bright orange suit. "Maxie would be blinded by the orange and Giovanni would attack and Maxie would be knocked unconscious."

"What would you do if someone stole one of your kidneys and sold it on the black market?" The trainer pulled out a knife from his mouth. How the heck did he do that? What magic, thought Charon.

"I would hope you would not sell it to Archer to put on the black market. Besides, I am old and my kidneys are not in peak condition. I've had quite a few stones…" Flint held up a hand signalling to Charon to stop talking about that right now. Charon didn't mind though – it brought back bad memories. Pokemaster exploded into many Murkrows as he did last time.

The roof opened up, allowing the first female of the session to fall through. She landed on two feet and didn't seem injured at all. "I'm DapieisTasty. What is your age?"

"I turned fifty-eight just two days ago," Charon said sadly, as no one had decided to celebrate his birthday. Heck, they probably didn't even know because no one wanted to become too attached to him.

"Happy birthday two days late!" Bertha called out.

Charon smiled. At least someone cared.

"Do you enjoy biting your tongue?"

Was this a trick question? He decided to go with the safest answer and shook his head. "No?" Why bite his own tongue when he could bite somebody else's?

"What is your greatest fear?"

"It used to be dying a virgin," Charon admitted. Once again, everyone gagged. "But now I would probably say my greatest fear is dying alone and unloved!" He started to cry until Bertha came over to pat his back.

"There there, sweetie. You have Bertha to service you for free!" She winked, and Charon immediately felt his mood lift.

"I am disgusted," Cyrus said.

"For once, I agree with you," Jupiter said.

DapieisTasty nodded. Suddenly, a bolt of lightning came down through the ceiling striking her, turning the trainer into a man. The trainer dropped dead. Jupiter made a move to remove the body, but Volkner said no. There was a letter attached to the trainer's body which read in capital letters, 'do not remove'.

The next trainer entered the room looking a little bit confused. Charon didn't recognize this trainer and the trainer didn't appear to recognize him either. "I'm Zarbapha. I don't actually have any questions prepared for Charon, but I was wondering if it's possible Cyrus might actually be related to Dawn!" Everyone looked at Cyrus who suddenly looked quite nervous.

"Yeah, are you?" Volkner said.

"Why do you assume she's mine?" Cyrus replied. "She could be Saturn's."

Saturn snorted. "I haven't slept with Johanna."

Cyrus looked away from Mars, not wanting to meet her eyes. "It hasn't been proven."

"You did follow her around a lot," Jupiter pointed out.

"And you did give her a master ball," Charon added.

"And you aren't very good at keeping your emotions hidden, boss," Saturn added. "You do tend to have random fits of evil laughter, fits of rage and 'oh my gosh, I'm so depressed' moments far too often."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Cyrus replied.

Flint nodded. "Yes, Saturn. Explain yourself."

Saturn shrugged. "I just wanted to point out to the boss he's not that good of an actor, that's all. You and Dawn should get tested – you might be related. It's worth checking out, boss." Cyrus muttered. Mars didn't look happy at all.

"Can we please go back to discussing my life?" Charon pointed out. "It's my time to shine."

Everyone looked away from Cyrus. Volkner looked at the trainer and smiled. "You can leave questions through a review! The girl who monitors them will then register your name so you can ask these lovely people your questions."

"Thanks, Volkner!" The trainer left the room rather quickly.

"That trainer didn't look too thrilled to see you Charon. I think you scared her," Flint said.

"Look on the bright side – at least he is wearing pants," Cyrus pointed out.

The next trainer entered. Charon remembered her as the hobo, but this time the trainer had golden hair. "CrackandDance here. First question, if you were given the privilege to change physical features with any gym leader or Elite Four, who would you change with?"

"Well, since I'm male and I am attracted to females, I would like to change physical features with Lance. He is seen as an attractive young male and attracts many fans. Although, out of curiosity, I would not mind taking on Karen's form as well just to see what it's like being a woman."

"I wonder what it's like to be a woman too from time to time," Flint said. Volkner looked at him oddly. Flint frowned, offended. "Haven't you ever looked in the mirror and wondered what you would look like if you were the opposite gender?"

Saturn raised his hand. "I do!"

Volkner just shook his head. "Why am I friends with you?"

"How would you describe the Sinnoh Elite Four?"

"Aaron is a weird guy who reminds me of an older version of Bugsy," Charon started.

Volkner laughed. "And Bertha?"

"I don't think we want to know what he thinks of Bertha. They have gotten pretty close," Mars said. Charon nodded. Bertha was a sexy lady.

"What do you think of Flint?" Volkner said, turning to grin at Flint.

Flint narrowed his eyes. "Yes, what do you think of me?"

"I like the afro. You seem like a pretty laid back guy."

"And Lucian?"

"Is feminine," Charon replied.

Flint released a booming laugh. "He is, isn't he? He actually uses expensive male moisturiser!"

"So do I!" Volkner protested.

Cyrus just groaned. "Can we get on with this, please?"

"And final question, would you consider your fellow Galactic commanders good battlers?"

Charon thought about it, stroking his chin, trying to determine how to best answer the question. Saturn, Jupiter and Mars thought they were good battlers, but they weren't really that strong. Cyrus obviously was a notch above them all since he was the big bad boss, but he could still be beaten. Not that he would actually admit that because the boss would cancel his porno dvd orders.

"Thanks!" the trainer said with a smile then turned towards the exit. Before they stepped out of the room though, the trainer turned around and said, "I don't want to interfere with your sexual life because you're old" then walked out.

As soon as CrackandDance left, a ball of fire catapulted in and exploded into the Magma logo. The ball then turned into the trainer they recognized as ShinyPoochyena45. She walked over to Mars (who was still pissed at Cyrus over the Dawn thing) and said out aloud for everyone to hear, "You are related to Maxie!"

"Oh Arceus!" Mars wailed. "I didn't want it to be true!" Cyrus thought to comfort her, but remembered she was still pissed at him so he did nothing.

"I love fire!" Flint blurted out.

He was ignored.

"How do you get on with that failed circus dwelling moron butler?"

"I start my morning with yoga exercises and I feel calm for the rest of the day," Charon said.

"Whose ideals do you agree with: Magma or Aqua?"

"Neither," Charon said. "Magma wants more land, but then there'll be no water. Aqua wants more water, but then there'll be no land. How would the human race survive?"

"They're both idiots," Cyrus said. "They didn't think about the consequences of their plans at all."

"Which is the most annoying of my Pokemon? Arcanine, Houndoom, Blaziken, Hydreigon or Camerupt?" Charon had a feeling that question was going to be asked at some point. Damn, he should've placed a bet on it. This time though, her Pokemon appeared from their pokeballs. Hydreigon terrorized Cyrus, Blaziken tried to frighten Mars and Houndoom rubbed his head against Saturn's hand. "Um, probably Arcanine. It's the fluffy tail." He honestly thought he was allergic to Pokemon with fluffy tails.

"Thanks for answering!"

The trainer withdrew her Pokemon and left. The final trainer of the session entered the room with a big smile. She looked quite happy to be here for some reason. She marched up to Charon. "GamerGirl54321 here. So Charon, if I bit your hands off with my epic demon teeth, since you are such a pervert, how would you jerk off?"

"He can't jerk off," Saturn said. "He can't get it up in the first place no matter how hard he tries."

"How did you know that?" Cyrus said. He then realized his mistake and quickly added, "Wait. I don't want to know."

"I would find someone else to do the honour or I'd get one of my machines to."

"What the…" started Cyrus. "Even I don't rely on machines that much." That was news to Charon. Was the boss implying that he too performed self-serving methods from time to time? It was hard to imagine the boss would actually do that, but then again, he was a human male and he had needs that needed to be fulfilled.

"That's just sick and not in a good way," Saturn said, scrunching his face up in disgust.

Volkner shuddered. "Gross."

"What would you do if the Slenderman kidnapped you, but you were rescued by the unicorns who had a dance party on Cyrus' lawn?"

"Cyrus would have to be drugged or drunk to be holding a party for starters," Charon said. "Rescued by unicorns sounds good though, but kidnapped by Slenderman? Not so much."

"Charon would shit his pants," Jupiter said.

"Gross," Volkner said again.

"Finally, what happened to make you so perverted?"

"I have a stronger sex drive than what is considered average," Charon said then frowned. "What's so bad about admiring other people?"

"I don't walk around the city looking the crotches of men," Mars said.

"Unless it's Cyrus," Jupiter said, rolling her eyes.

Mars blushed. "So?!"

"She's obsessed with the D," Saturn pointed out. He looked down at his lap. "I wished someone lusted after mine like that…" He shook his head sadly.

GamerGirl54321 shook her head at Charon's perve nature. He was a truly a disgusting slob. "Thanks, see you around Team Galactic." She exited the room. Charon headed back to his seat. Jupiter stood up and walked to the centre of the floor. Here we go again, she thought.

.

Feel free to smite me down for taking too long to update. I got a little sidetracked by a game called 'Sims 3' and creating the Team Galactic members and putting them through hell (Charon kept beating up Cyrus – fun times). I will try and update faster next time. The next chapter is the last of round two so that means there'll be someone new taking over soon! Any guesses? Hint: Read 'Secrets'. As always, reviews are much appreciated!


	11. Jupiter, Round Two

**Disclaimer**

I do not own Pokemon unfortunately

**Title**

Questions and Answers

**Summary**

Team Galactic are forced to answer a series of questions about their personal lives.

**Special Thanks**

Thanks to Twilightcrystalflame, Zarbapha, Pokemaster Ace, DapieisTasty, Daxe12, GamerGirl54321, ExtremelyCreativeUsername, Ms Loner and ShinyPoochyena45 for reviewing the previous chapter!

If you want another Galactic-interview based story, check out ExtremelyCreativeUsername's 'Ask Galactic Redo'

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**Chapter Eleven: Jupiter, Round Two**

Jupiter stood in the middle of the room her pants missing. Naturally, she had to be the one to suffer humiliation. Why did life have to be so cruel? She shivered. It was cold and having people stare at her shapely legs was awkward. She could've sworn Charon was drooling at one point.

Flint tore his eyes away and cleared his throat nervously. "Let's… let's get on with the show!" He turned to Volkner and said, "Why is it always the bad girls that have to have hot bodies?" Volkner shrugged. "First trainer, please enter!" Flint added.

The glass ceiling shattered, and shards of glass plummeted to the ground, hitting all those who were in range. Charon was one of those people. A shard sliced into his right hand causing blood to spill everywhere. Fortunately, everyone else was fine. They just laughed at Charon and his misery. Bertha ran over and wrapped his hand up with thick bandages she pulled out from her cleavage.

"Twilightcrystalflame here! First question, what is your opinion on purplepeopleshipping? That's you and Petrel by the way."

Who came up with these weird shipping names? "I don't like him and I don't understand why people would want to pair me up with him – is it because we both have purple hair? That's so silly," she said, placing a hand on her right hip, glaring. "I went out with him just once and it was awful. He expected me to pay for everything."

"Would you have a threesome with Saturn and Mars if you became a millionaire after?"

She looked thoughtful. "Sure, if the boss would allow it. I mean who wouldn't turn down a million dollars just for having sex?" Flint, Volkner and Charon whistled approvingly. "I don't think he'd allow Mars to have sexual relations with another male though because that would hurt his male ego." Cyrus just snorted.

"Would you rather sleep with Maxie, Courtney or Brodie?"

"Courtney is her team's whore so I wouldn't go anywhere near her… as for Brodie, he's just weird. He can't even put eyeliner on correctly… So I'd probably go with the boss."

"And finally, have you ever been robbed?"

"Yes," she said slowly, throwing a glare in Mars' direction. "I found her snooping through my make up drawer!"

"I was looking for some lipstick!"

"Get your own, whore!" Jupiter snapped. "You don't even wear lipstick anyway!" A horrible thought dawned on her. What did Mars do with her lipstick stuff – she knew the girl was interested in experimenting, but would she… Oh Arceus no! "You know what? Just keep it, all right? I don't want to know where you've put that thing."

"That's all from me!" The trainer rushed forward, knelt down to Jupiter's pants and pulled out her favourite lipstick. She also picked up a small camera. Jupiter tried to protest – there were embarrassing photos of herself doing weird things – on that camera! "Ha!" the trainer said, sticking out her tongue. "You won't be getting these back anytime soon! Ah, the joys of being the younger sister of a phantom thief!" She stood up, gave Jupiter's hair a sharp dug and then somehow magically flew out through the hole in the roof.

"Just when I thought things couldn't get any stranger…" Volkner murmured, rubbing his eyes.

The next trainer walked in. "I'm Zarbapha."

"I thought you were a female?"

"No, that was just someone pretending to be me." He turned to Jupiter. "If you could ensnare any man (or responsive woman) whose power and influence would benefit her and her allies, and make them tread across that Blue Line, who would she welcome into Night's embrace?

"Cynthia, probably. She was the first female to become Champion after all." Cynthia had so much power over the majority of the population. People would do anything for her. She wished she had that much influence, but so far only needy men and dumb grunts listened to her.

"Also, were all those grunts as stupid as they looked?"

Jupiter nodded. "Sadly, yes. Cyrus recruited all the dumb ones for some reason." She turned to look at the boss and shook her head then turned back. "We have the dumbest grunts in the criminal world. We are the laughing stock. I really don't know what Cyrus was thinking." Although the grunts were stupid, they made good target practice.

"That's it from me." The trainer exited the room.

A plane carrying bucket loads of blood flew by, pouring blood over everyone standing in the open. A golden Magikarp was lying in the middle. It spat up a trainer they recognized as Pokemaster Ace, the blood guy.

"Where exactly did you hear that sex sells?"

Jupiter shrugged. "At the porn studio. There's big money in it, you know."

"What is your opinion of my idiotic uncle Lysandre?"

"He has nice clothes, and he is a romantic at heart, but he's quite sensitive," Jupiter said.

Saturn nodded. "He was crying the other day over the fact someone crushed his favourite flowers. They caught him on television."

"He was also sobbing after watching an episode of N's _Neverland _show," Mars added.

"Do you want to the frikle frackle with my straight sister not so human anymore? She might fight you, but that's a part of the game."

"I only do stuff like that with humans, so sorry, the answer is no." Doing sexual activities should only happen between pure humans. Apparently, there was a growing business in humans and Pokemon sleeping together and that was terrifying.

"That's it for now." The golden Magikarp swallowed him whole then burst into a flock of Murkrows. The Murkrows flew away.

"What is it with that guy and Murkrows?" Volkner said.

Flint didn't answer. He was confused as well. "Next trainer, please!"

DapieisTasty entered the room, appearing behind Jupiter, holding a knife to her neck. Jupiter gulped, and prayed to Arceus that the trainer wouldn't kill her. If anyone needed to die, it was Charon. "Are you a lesbian?"

"I'm bi actually. It depends on what mood I'm in. Sometimes I'll go for girls and sometimes I'll go for guys," Jupiter said. Cyrus just looked at her with a 'wtf' look. Jupiter frowned. "What? I go where the money is." Volkner whispered into Flint's ear something which sounded suspiciously like, 'shall we ask her for a threesome, yeah?'

"What is your real name?"

"Sandra."

"Sandra?" Saturn repeated.

Jupiter nodded. "That's my real name… and you can't laugh. Your real name is Waldo, Saturn."

Saturn turned red in the face. Everyone laughed, even Cyrus. Waldo, what a name.

"Do you like chicken?"

That was random. She nodded. "I like chicken, yes."

"Thanks for answering. Bye." DapiesisTasty exited the room completely ignoring everyone else, as if there had been nobody else present.

GamerGirl54321 entered. "ARE THOSE BREAST IMPLANTS?" she said in a really loud voice. Why the trainer was yelling nobody knew, and Jupiter just assumed she was really excited to be talking to Jupiter.

"They're not, I swear! It's all natural!"

"Don't be a liar, Jupiter! You know you got implants for your role at the porn studio!" Mars argued.

Jupiter's face reddened. "Well… so what? At least they're not my small!"

"You got that right," Flint said, winking.

Jupiter rolled her eyes. Men.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MARIO? AND DON'T SAY YOU DON'T KNOW HIM. EVERYONE KNOWS HIM."

"I like playing the games. They're heaps of fun," Jupiter said. "When there's nothing to do, the boss allows us to play Mario games."

Everyone turned to face Cyrus. He just shrugged. "It keeps them occupied."

"CAN YOU LIST ALL THE DUMB WAYS TO DIE?"

"I could… but I'd spend the rest of my life writing a list. There's new methods coming out every day. Death by honey and ants, death by piano falling on head, death my falling off cliff…" To think people actually spent time coming up with dumb ways to die. The trainer suddenly exploded, leaving all in the room shocked.

They got over their shock relatively quickly though since they were quite accustomed to explosions. ExtremelyCreativeUsername came rushing in. She immediately gave Jupiter a hug and Jupiter hugged her back. This seemed to be the only trainer that actually liked her. "Would you rather hook up with Mars or Charon?" Mars gagged.

"I'd rather kiss a toilet seat than make out with Charon." Charon hung his head in shame. "Mars though… We don't see eye to eye, but she's a better choice than Charon. Again though, I'd have to ask the boss."

"Why did you agree to join Team Galactic, anyway?"

"I was getting too old to be part of the porn industry so I needed a job elsewhere. Cyrus came along and gave me an offer and I couldn't say no. Getting promoted to a commander was difficult… and unexpected… but I'm sure he'll explain that later, won't you boss?" She grinned in the boss' direction. He looked uncomfortable all of a sudden.

"What would you do if you were a boy for a day?"

Her grin widened. "I'd check out the package in between my legs of course!"

Saturn nodded. "I'd do the same if I were a girl for a day. I wouldn't have to ask to touch breasts..." A dazed looked appeared in his eyes. Mars slapped him. He almost cried.

"Bye, Jupi!" She waved and left.

Suddenly, a snowstorm appeared from nowhere. It was suddenly very cold. The snowstorm was lasted a few seconds though fortunately. "I'm Ms Loner. I'm here to ask you the questions of doom! What would you do if your game does not have a remake, Jupiter?"

"Be very upset," she replied. "I mean, we're due for a remake soon. Fingers crossed it happens next year otherwise we'll have to make a petition."

Cyrus nodded. "Yes, I would be interested to see how ridiculous they make me look," he said dryly.

"But yeah, hopefully it happens."

"Are you sure you're not tsundere?"

"I might have a cold exterior, but I'm actually a very nice person. You just have to earn it by overlooking my icy mask."

"What happened to you when you snuck into either Cyrus' or Saturn's room to take a picture and immediately posted onto a website?"

"It depends on what I took a photo of. It's pretty hard breaking into the fortress of Cyrus' room, but Saturn shares a room with me. I'm always taking photos of him and he doesn't care. He likes it. I can't imagine Cyrus would be too pleased though… he'd probably make me belly-dance for the male grunts."

"I would love to see that," said Flint.

"Flint, you're drooling," Volkner said, pointing to a glob of drool hanging down from the side of his mouth. Flint wiped it off.

"Could you handle the extreme temperature with only your normal clothes when you are at the top of Mt. Silver to face Red?"

"I'd probably freeze. We live in the warmer parts of Sinnoh so no, I wouldn't be able to handle it."

"That is all!" Ms Loner said. A blizzard whipped around her as she left.

"Will the final trainer please enter?" Flint called out.

A ball of fire fell through the hole in the roof and exploded, leaving a mark of the Magma logo etched in the ground. ShinyPoochyena45 looked around. "Anyone wanna battle?"

"Battle me, later! Let's fight fire with fire!"Flint said.

She walked over to Jupiter. "Would you rather lie with Blaise or Tabitha from my team?"

"I've already done both so it doesn't matter anymore."

She walked over and slapped Jupiter in the face then returned to her position. "What would you do if Team Magma kidnapped Saturn?"

"Be disappointed. He's my toy and friend. I'd have to find another male to fill in Saturn's role…" Jupiter looked over to the boss who glared in response. "Oh come on, I think you'd enjoy it, boss."

"I would not stoop so low."

She sighed. "Oh well, I tried."

ShinyPoochyena45 summoned her team of Pokemon and Jupiter knew exactly what question was coming next. "Hydreigon, Camerupt, Arcanine, Mightyena, Houndoom or Blaziken – who is most annoying?"

"Camerupt. The Pokemon is too slow – you can't have any sort of fun with it and that's annoying, especially if you're bored."

ShinyPoochyena45 skipped over to Saturn and planted a kiss on his cheek then turned around and left, disappearing in a ball of fire. Jupiter returned to her position and sat down, trying not to make eye contact with anyone. Flint and Volkner walked down to stand in front of the team.

"Well, I hate to say this, but we have to leave now. It's been fun, and I hope we can be friends," Volkner said, looking at Jupiter again, as if to say 'come share my bed later, yeah?' "Your new host should be here shortly."

"Who is it?" Mars said.

"It's-"

"WHERE ARE THE BASTARDS?" The door was blasted down and a man with a black robe stormed in, slamming his pimp cane onto the ground. Cyrus groaned. Not _him. _

"Well Team Galactic, say hello to Ghetsis. I'm sure you've heard about him on television before. Have fun! Bye all!" Flint and Volkner raced out of the room.

Ghetsis threw his head back and laughed. The Galactic members just looked at each other. They were stuck with Ghetsis, the craziest one of them all. He stopped laughing. "You will all face the wrath of the mighty Ghetsis! Refuse to answer any questions and I'll have my Hydreigon fuck you badly. I would kill you, but I'm not allowed to." Nervous laughter filled the air. "I will just have to find another way to make you assholes squirm. Now," he walked over to Saturn and stabbed the tip of his pimp cane into Saturn's stomach. "Pretty boy! You are up!"

Saturn yelped. "Please don't hurt me."

"You fools are all going to be answering M rated questions! I will be recording this and keeping a copy for my records so I can blackmail you all later should you try to get revenge on me." Ghetsis stabbed Saturn again. Saturn screamed and ran to the centre.

"I'm scared," Saturn said.

Ghetsis' XTransceiver rang. He picked it up and answered it. "Who is this? Daxe12? You want to ask Saturn some questions before the sex round begins? All right then. I'll allow it because you are already here. Come inside and make fun of the fool." He put it away.

Daxe12 walked up to Saturn. Have you ever been completely demolished by some random kid other than Dawn?"

"I had a round with Silver once when his father came over for tea. He destroyed me. It was a sad day."

Ghetsis started cackling. "You got defeated by a kid? Ah ha ha ha ha ha!"

"If I'm not mistaken, Ghetsis… Did you not get defeated _twice _by _two children?_" Cyrus said.

Ghetsis' laughter ceased. He poked Cyrus with his stick. "Shut up! Do not speak of such things! They caught me on a bad day… Yes, that's it! A bad day!"

"Isn't your stick supposed to be broken?" Jupiter said.

"I got it repaired for a hefty fee."

"Saturn, has Cyrus ever tried using a squirt bottle to get you to stop doing something?"

"He just uses his Pokemon to attack me to stop me from doing something. He thinks it's amusing." Saturn gave his boss a sullen look. Cyrus didn't bother replying – he was too busy glaring at Ghetsis.

"Thanks for answering. Bye!" Daxe12 left.

Ghetsis waved his pimp cane around some more then laughed again for no real reason. "Let the torture begin!"

.

And Ghetsis has arrived to take over the next round! This is a special round, everyone – M rated questions only! Saturn will be up first! Ask away – don't keep it clean! I will allow four questions max.


End file.
